Harder Dan Ik Hebben Kan
by Tak Dragon
Summary: Matthew Williams didn't have many friends. Untill he met a strange, mysterious man from the Netherlands. He never expected someone to love him like the Dutch man does, but... what will he do when it turns out that his friend Francis is also in love with him?
1. Chapter 1

Matthew Williams opened his eyes, only to be greeted by a white, fluffy bear ass. With a soft sigh, he shoved the polar bear cub off of him, and stood up. He yawned, and went to the kitchen to make his favourite breakfast: pancakes with maple syrup. But before he could put the first pancake in his mouth, he heard something. His phone was ringing.

With hope in his heart, he quickly grabbed it. He then looked at the screen. "Francis" stood there, with blinking green letters.

Finally! He had promised Matthew he would call him a long time ago, but it seemed like he forgot…

"Hello?"

"Ah, bonjour, mon Mathieu!" said Francis' voice on the other side.

"Papa!" Matthew replied cheerfully.

He had always called Francis his 'papa' for as long as he could remember. When he was still a little kid, his parents had forgotten him when they were travelling through France, but luckily, Francis found him. The Frenchman was still a teenager back then, but he managed to raise Matthew by himself. The two grew very close, and they developed a brother-like bond.

"Mathieu, I want to see you again. Can you come over?"

Matthew's heart jumped in his chest. He had alway been alone after he had left Francis. It wasn't that he really wanted to leave his other friends, and kinda left Matthew behind.

"Allright, I will be there in an hour. Bye!" With a smile, Matthew put the phone back in his pocket. He quickly ate his pancakes, and rushed upstars.

After a while, he was ready, and he picked up his growling bear cub, Kumasaburou. Or Kumajimaru. Or whatever his name was.

"Hey, annoying little brat! Let me go!" the bear growled. "Or do you want your finger to be pierced?"

Matthew smiled at the animal in his arms.

"We're going to Francis. If you behave the whole time, I will give you the best salmon, okay?"

The cub growled a bit, but stayed silent after that.

"Good. Let's go."

Matthew buried his face in Kumajirou's soft fur. He hesitated. What if Francis would forget him again? But then he shook his head. Of course Francis wouldn't forget him.

He pressed the door bell, and immediately, the door opened. Kumajirou could just jump away before Matthew got squished in a tight hug by his beloved friend.

"Mon Mathieu!"

Matthew lied his head on Francis' shoulder, and hugged him back. He jumped when Francis squeezed his butt.

"You've gotten thinner, Mathieu."

"Oh... I didn't know..." Matthew answered, with a bright red blush on his face.

"Come inside! I see you have brought your little friend with you~" Francis winked at Kumajirou, who just walked away. Matthew followed Francis inside.

"Look, _mes amis_, this is my cute Mathieu~"

Matthew blinked, and stopped walking. On the couch were two people.

A short man with blond hair, green eyes and thick eyebrows, stared at him. Next to him was a man, about Matthew's age, with sparkling blue eyes, that looked at him from behind his glasses. The man had short, dusty blond hair with a strange cowlick sticking up.

"Howdy, sir!" The man jumped up and patted Matthew on his shoulder. Then, he looked at the ceiling, with his finger on his chin. "Uhm... What was your name again?"

"I'm Matt—"

"Hey, Artie! What were we talking about again?" The man turned his back to Matthew.

"Eh... I'm sorry, but... I think you didn't hear me..."

"Hmm? I thought I heard something..." The loud man laughed. "I guess it's nothing!"

Matthew sighed. Francis' friends didn't even see him... He wished he had Kumajirou with him, so he could hide...

"Euh, Mathieu..."

He felt a soft hand on his shoulder. He looked up, to see Francis looking at him with a concerned gaze.

"These are my friends, Arthur," he pointed at the man with the eyebrows, "and Alfred." Now he pointed at the younger man.

"Oh..." Matthew sighed.

"I'm sorry, mon Mathieu..." Francis wrapped his arms around Matthew, and hugged him again. Matthew tried to hug back, but when he received an angry glare from Arthur, he quickly released him.

"Mon Mathieu, I think that you need a friend!"

The boy looked at Francis hopefully.

"Maybe... you could hang out with Toni and Gil!"

Matthew sighed again, and stared at his feet. It wasn't that he didn't like Francis' other friends, they just... they were not his type.

He just opened his mouth to say something, when he heard an angry growl from behind him. He turned around, to see Kumajirou, growling and showing his sharp teeth.

"You..." He stared right at Arthur. "You are responsible for this, fat eyebrow!"

Arthur stared down at the polar bear, confused.

"You teasucker! Give my real body back!"

"I'm afraid I don't understand you," the man replied, in a calm voice with a thick British accent.

"You... destroyed my human body! You gave me this fucking bear body!"

With a snarl, Kumajirou jumped straight at Arthur's face, and started to bite him everywhere.

"Kuma!" Matthew ran to them, and, with lots of effort, managed to pull his bear away.

"I will bite your fingers off!" Kumajirou shouted, before Matthew dragged him to the hallway.

"Kuma... I don't know what just happened, but... don't just attack other people!"

Kumajirou looked away. "That bitch changed my body with his stupid magic tricks. And now leave me!" The bear clawed at Matthew's face, leaving a red mark behind, before jumping out of his arms and running outside.

Matthew stood in shock. His bear always treated to hurt him, but he had never done it before.

However, that was not important now. Kuma was also the only one who never really left his side, and always remembered him (though he pretended not to). And Matthew had to help him.

He ran outside, only to bump into Francis' other two friends.

A man with somewhat curly, dark brown hair and sparkling green eyes looked at him. The other one had silvery hair, and dark red eyes. He had a big grin on his face, which showed his sharp teeth.

"Antonio... Gilbert... Have you two seen my bear? He ran away, and... I'm afraid something has happened to him..."

Antonio smiled. "Now you mention it, I think I have seen a little snowball running off to somewhere..."

"Snowball? That totally-not-awesome animal went that way." Gilbert pointed behind him.

Matthew nodded. "Thank you!" He ran straight past them, and looked around. After a while, he finally found a white butt sticking from above a bush.

"Kuma, I finally—"

Matthew immediately stopped when he saw what the bear was looking at.

It was a small bunny, it's fur white with brown spots. He was eating, and completely oblivious of the danger approaching him.

"Kumajirou!" Matthew shouted, right before the bear charged at the little bunny.

The small animal sat up, looked at the cub for a few seconds, and then stormed away. However, Kumajirou was faster. Matthew tried to stop the bear, but he couldn't catch up with him.

He closed his eyes, not wanting to see what was going to happen. He heard a loud snarl, but after that... it stayed silent. Only a little growling from Kumajirou could be heard, but not even a small squeak from the bunny.

"Nobody touches my Nijntje," said a deep voice.

With a soft gasp, Matthew opened his eyes, and he looked straight into cold green ones. The owner of the eyes was a tall man, with a long, brown coat, a white and blue scarf, and spiky, light brown hair. There was also a small scar on his forehead. Kumajirou was biting in his leg, which he had placed between the cub and the bunny.

The tall man coughed. "Hallo. Is this your _beer_?" he asked, with his cold, deep voice.

Matthew nodded shyly, and he quickly picked the polar bear up, and held him firmly in his arms.

"I- I'm sorry..."

The man's stare made him feel uncomfortable.

"It's the bear's fault," the man simply replied, before he let his bunny hop on his shoulder. He stared at Matthew once again, then turned around and walked away with a quick pace.

The only thing Matthew could do was stare, untill the man disappeared from his sight. His face was a bright red now, and he hid behind Kumajirou.

"Fucking bitch," the bear growled. He turned his head, and licked the wound he had left behind on Matthew's cheek earlier. "Hm. I'm hungry," Kuma said, like nothing happened.

"Yes... I will ask papa if he has some food..." Matthew was still staring at the spot where the man had disappeared. Only after Kumajirou had slapped him twice, he snapped out of his gaze, and walked back to Francis' house.

"Papa? Do you have any salmon?" Matthew asked, as he walked into the living room. The others were her, talking and laughing.

"P... Papa?" Matthew tried again, but they didn't seem to notice him. "Pa...pa..." He tugged at Francis' sleeve, but there was no response. Gilbert looked at him once, but he didn't say anything.

With a soft sigh, Matthew went upstairs. He didn't want to bother the others with his presence, when they didn't even see him...

He walked to the room that had been his bedroom before he left, and let himself fall down on the bed. He buried his face in his pillow. Sobbing, he pulled Kumajirou closer and hugged the bear tightly. Why did everyone forget him? Why could nobody see him?

When he heard Kumajirou's quiet snores, he bursted into tears. Of course, he was used to the fact that everyone ignored him. But it had happened so often... He wanted a change.

Suddenly, he heard the sound of heavy footsteps. He quickly sat up, and wiped his tears away. He didn't want to show anyone his weakness.

The door opened, and someone walked in.

Matthew gasped when he realised who it was. The tall man, who had the bunny on his shoulder, was staring at him for the second time this day.

"You are crying," he said, as if it was just a random fact.

Matthew shivered. He didn't really like this. Maybe it was his cold stare, maybe his serious face... He trembled when the man bore his eyes in Matthew's violet ones.

"What's your name?"

"Ehm... I... My... I am... Matthew..." the smaller boy whispered.

"Hm." The man placed his hand on Matthew's head. "Tim. Call me when you feel sad." He pressed a note in Matthew's hand. "...Matthijs."

"T...Thank you... But... I don't need help..." Matthew smiled. Deep in his heart, he was glad that this strange man wanted to help him. But he also didn't want to bother Tim with his thoughts. And he still felt uncomfortable around him.

"W... Why are you here?" Matthew asked.

"Going to sleep here," was Tim's answer.

"Oh..." Matthew stared at Kumajirou, who was curled up in his lap. Was this strange man also a part of Francis' friends? He didn't seem like it... He was mysterious, quiet, and... intimidating, unlike Francis' other friends.

Matthew looked at Tim, and suddenly realized Tim's hand was still on his head. He blushed shyly.

Then he felt Kumajirou moving in his lap, and before he knew what happened, the bear had jumped at Tim's face.

Matthew had closed his eyes from the shock, and when he opened them, he saw another surprise. Tim was holding the angry polar bear firmly by his fur, leaving the cub unable to do any damage.

"I thought I already told you, nobody touches my Nijntje!" He stared at Kuma, before he threw him on the bed, next to Matthew. The boy quickly took his bear in his arms, and stood up.

"I... think I will go now..."

Matthew buried his face in Kuma's fur again, and walked past Tim, without looking him in the eyes. "Bye," he whispered.

He walked faster and faster, untill he eventually started to run. He stormed out of the house, and quickly got in his car. Then he speeded away, all the time holding Tim's note firmly in his hand.


	2. Chapter 2

A week had passed since Matthew went to Francis and he met his new friend. At least, he hoped that Tim would consider him as a friend. Matthew cursed. Of course the tall man wouldn't think of him as a friend! They had only met twice, and both times, Kumajirou had attacked Tim's bunny. He must have thought Matthew was an annoying kid who couldn't even take care of the cub.

"I want food," Kumajirou growled, while he bit in Matthew's pants.

Matthew leaned down, and petted the polar bear on his head. "But... Kumasaburou, we just had dinner!"

"I don't care, I'm hungry. And who are you?"

"I'm Matthew..." The boy sighed. "Kuma, I have to go to work. Can I leave you alone?"

Kumajirou growled a bit, and then walked to the couch. He yawned, curled up, and closed his eyes.

"Fine. Just stay there, and maybe I will give you salmon." Matthew smiled, and then went to his work.

It was already dark when Matthew arrived at the big house, where they would meet. He looked around, to check if nobody had seen him, but to his relief, the streets were empty. He felt his pocket, to make sure that he had his gun. He grabbed his weapon firmly, just so he would feel safe. He was nervous, as always.

He had never wanted a job like this, but he had no choice. Because he was raised by Francis, he had never went to school. However, he knew a lot, because he always read many books. But that wasn't enough for a proper job. Now, he was part of the Mafia, lead by the Vargas brothers. In fact, he and the Italian brothers were the only one in the group.

Just as Matthew looked at his phone to check the time, he heard footsteps. He looked up, and saw the two Italian brothers, Lovino and Feliciano, walking towards him.

Lovino glanced at Matthew with his strange eyes, that switched between green and brown, depending on the light.

Feliciano smiled brightly, and waved at him. Matthew wanted to walk to them, but Lovino stopped. "Wait. There are two others coming with us."

Matthew blinked in confusion. Why would there be others?

"W...Who?" Matthew asked, but Lovino was already busy talking to Feliciano. "Ehm... excuse me..."

"Oi, _Freunde_!"

Matthew turned around, and immediately facepalmed when he recognised the man in front of him.

A grinning albino with silver-white hair. His yellow bird sat on his head, and the man was wearing sunglasses. He also had short leather pants, high boots, and a leather jacket.

"Gilbert... What are you doing here?" Matthew asked in confusion.

"You can't do awesome things without the awesome me, Kesesesese~"

"Gilbert, this isn't awesome!" Matthew protested.

"Oh, it is! Very awesome! I mean, who doesn't want to run around in sexy leather with a gun—"

Before he could finish his sentence, Lovino had punched him hard in his face.

"And now stay silent, damn it!" the Italian boy hissed.

"Ow! Mattie! Give me a kiss, it hurts!" Gilbert pointed at his cheek, that was already beginning to turn red. "Pleaaaase~?"

BAM! Another blow from Lovino. "Damn it, bastard! I told you to stay silent!"

Suddenly, Matthew noticed another person, standing a few meters from the others. The person was smoking something. It looked like a big pipe.

Matthew gasped when the man walked into the light. He could never forget those green eyes.

"Hm. _Hallo_," the big man said.

"_Fratello_? Why are they here?" Feliciano asked.

"Damn it, Feli, I already told you! Listen to me for once! That Dr. Potato is here because—"

"Because I'm awesome li—" Gilbert immediately stopped when he saw Lovino's trembling fists. "B-But my cousin is here because he needed money," he continued, a little less arrogant.

Tim exhaled, and blew the smoke in Gilbert's face. The albino coughed, a little too much for the tiny amount of smoke.

"M-Mattie! Ugh... H-Help me... I'm d-dying..." he coughed, while he fell on his knees. He reached for Matthew with his hand. "Only... a k-kiss can s-save...me..." He fell on the ground, and closes his eyes. "Too...late..."

Matthew facepalmed again. This was why Gilbert would never get a chance with him.

"Hey..." Gilbert opened his eyes again. "Why is none of you wearing sexy leather? I wanted to see Mattie in sexy leather..."

Lovino kicked him hard where it hurts.

"Aaaaargh!" Gilbert pressed his hands against his crotch. "Mattie! Kiss me! It hurts!"

Suddenly, Tim stepped towards Gilbert, and threw him over his shoulder. "_Idioot_", he said.

"L-Let's go..." Matthew whispered. Not that he really needed to whisper, his voice was already soft enough.

Lovino nodded. "We have to kill someone. Feliciano and... that guy with the glasses... are too weak. Don't trust that Dr. Potato. So..." Lovino looked at Tim. "You. Bastard. You will kill him."

Tim raised his eyebrows. "And... why do I have to kill a person?"

"Because that's your job, damn it! And because this person threatened to kill my... I mean Antonio. Damn it. Fuck."

Gilbert grinned. "And why don't I know who tried to kill _mein Freund_, little Lovi~?"

Another blow, this time in his stomach.

"NEVER call me that!" the boy yelled.

"But Fratello!" Feliciano whined.

"Shut up, Feli!" Lovino growled. He pulled Feliciano closer by his collar and whispered something in the smaller boy's ear.

Feliciano's face lit up. "Really, Fratello?! That makes me so happy!" He wrapped his arms around Lovino, who was trying to escape. Only after a minute, he managed to push Feli away.

"Damn it, you idiot! Don't do that, damn it! Damn it, idiot, DAMN IT!" Lovino's face turned redder and redder, and his voice raised an octave with each 'damn it'.

"Hm." That was the only thing Tim said, before he walked away.

"Hey! Wait, you bastard!" Lovino stormed after him. "I am the leader! Don't just walk away on your own!"

Feliciano took Mathew's hand, and ran after his brother. "Fratello! My legs are not as long as yours! Wait, _per favore_!"

They finally catched up with the others after a while.

"Hey, what's your name again? I keep forgetting it..." Feliciano asked.

"I'm Matthew..." the boy answered with a smile. Feliciano did forget him, but he still tried to remember.

"Oh. Okay! Vee~"

Feliciano chatted with Matthew the whole time, untill they reached the house. It was an enormous building. The garden was big, and had all sorts of bamboo and sunflowers in it.

"Feliciano. You go and look if anyone's here. If they see you, talk to them like you always do. Tell them that you are lost and all. Not a word about us. Got it?"

Feli nodded. "Ve~! _Si_!"

"Okay." Lovino turned to Matthew. "When Feli comes back to us, or starts to talk to someone, you will find a way to go inside. If you have found one, we will go inside. I will look if there are others inside, and if there are, you," he glared at Gilbert, "will distract them. And BE CAREFUL, DAMN IT!"

Before Lovino could shout more, Feliciano silenced him with a finger on his lips. The older Italian growled.

"Fine. If the Dr. Potato distracts them, you, smoking bastard, go to the victim, and you will kill him. After that, run like Feliciano—"

"Hey!"

"—and escape. Make sure that, if they catch you, you won't say a thing about us. Understood?"

Feli, Matthew and Gilbert nodded. Tim just stood there, while he put his pipe in his pocket.

"Damn it. Let's go." Lovino pushed his brother in the garden. The little boy looked around him, and then walked around in the garden.

Suddenly, the door opened, and a young looking man with long, dark brouwn hair, tied in a pony-tail, walked outside.

"Hm? Who's there-aru?"

Matthew heard Lovino growl next to him. "Damn it."

Feliciano tried to look for a place where he could hide, but the man had already seen him.

"Hey! What are you doing here-aru?"

Feliciano walked to the man, and tilted his head. He looked at him with wide, brown eyes and wiped at an invisible tear.

"I...I am lost, mister. And I don't know where my big brother is!"

"Now!" Lovino hissed, and the four men sneaked to the back of the house. Now it was Matthew's turn to do his job. He quickly ran to an open window. He didn't need to be careful yet, because no-one would see him, even if he stood right in front of them.

There was a big tree in front of the window. Matthew grinned. It was as if it was put there on the purpose of letting people inside.

Matthew waved at the others to let them know that they could come. He climbed in the tree, and sat on the highest branch he could reach, so he could watch over the whole garden. He looked at the others, who went inside the house.

Matthew lied down on the branch, and stared at the few stars he could see through the leaves. He sighed, and listened to Feli's whines.

"But... I want my brother! Now!"

After Matthew had heard a complete story about their childhood, and why Feliciano REALLY needed to find his brother, he started to worry. What if something happened to them? What if the 'victim', as Lovino called it, was a killer himself, and actually killed them?

Matthew jumped through the window. When he set foot in the house, immediately a shiver ran down his spine. It was becoming cold... It felt like it was freezing...

He looked around him. It was just a normal bedroom. The only strange things were loads of stuffed toy panda's.

That's when he heard it. A strange sound, coming from the room next to the one he was in now. It made him shiver all over his body.

"_KolKolKolKolKolKolKol..._"

Matthew started to panic. He had heard of this before. There was a rumor of a big man who tried to kidnap people and make them his slaves. He would chant '_KolKol_' whenever he was angry, or was going to kidnap someone.

Matthew didn't know if this rumor was true or not. But he knew that the sound from the room next to him was real.

"H...Hello...? W-Who is there...?" he tried, but there was no response.

The boy held his gun firmly in both hands.

"C-Come out! I-I can h-hear you!"

He shivered over his whole body, but he had to be strong. For his friends.

He tried to control his breath, and then, he kicked the door open. Only to find an empty room.

"I-Is s-someone there?" Matthew stepped inside, and looked around him. Still nobody.

"Hm... That's weird..."

"Are you lost, my little friend?"

Matthew jumped, and quickly turned around. In front of him was a big man, with light blond hair and violet eyes. He was wearing a long, pink scarf, and had a blood-stained faucet pipe in his hand.

Matthew stepped back. He felt very unsafe around this man.

"Are you looking for your friends, _da_?"

The younger man shook his head. "No... I'm alone..." He wouldn't tell anyone about the others, even if that meant that this man would kill him.

"_Da_? Really?" The man showed a childish smile. "Ufufu~ Then I assume you don't know about those other guys... That mean one, and the one in the weird clothes, and that one with that strange hair..."

Matthew pointed his gun at the man, with trembling hands.

"D-Don't h-hurt them!"

The big man just looked at Matthew, still with his smile on his face. "Ufu~ I guess you're too late then..."


	3. Chapter 3

"W…What do you mean…?" Matthew asked. He didn't want to believe that his firends were hurt, or maybe even worse...

"Feliciano! That guy is a killer!" sounded Lovino's voice from somewhere in the house.

"Oh... They found out..." The big man grinned.

"Fratello! Help!" That was Feliciano's voice.

"You! Don't touch my brother!"

Suddenly, the door closed behind the man, and the sounds from the others were cut off. It started freezing again.

Matthew walked backwards, untill his back hit the wall. He looked up, and saw that the man was now right in front of him.

He leaned closer, untill his big nose touched Matthew's.

"Yao will take care of your friends. You don't have to worry." He smiled again. A creepy, purple aura surrounded him.

Matthew looked straight in the man's purple eyes. It looked as if they were glowing.

"Ufufu~ Fuhuhu~"

Matthew froze in fear. He couldn't move. And even if he could, there was no way he could escape...

"KolKolKolKolKol... I like you... become one with me, _da_?"

Matthew didn't move. He only stared into the eyes of the man.

"Become...one...with me..."

Suddenly, the door opened with a loud 'bang', and Matthew gasped loudly.

"Turn around, Russian." It was Tim, standing there, pointing his gun at the other man's head. The man turned around, and charged at Tim with his faucet pipe. Tim jumped back, and pointed his gun again at the Russian. However, he could not shoot, because if the man would move, he would hit Matthew.

Unfortunately, the other man had seen it too. He turned around, and lifted the pipe. Matthew could only watch as the pipe got swung in his direction. He closed his eyes, waiting for the sharp pain of a piece of metal crashing in his skin. But, the pain never came. However, there was the sound of tearing flesh. Afther that, the dripping of blood on the floor.

Matthew's eyes flew wide open. In front of him was Tim, protecting him with his body. He pulled the pipe out of his back, and threw it on the ground. He slowly stood up, and grabbed Matthew's arm firmly. He then ran away, limping, and pulling Matthew with him.

They quickly got out of the house, but didn't stop untill they were far away.

"_Verdomme_."

Tim let himself fall down on a wooden bench, and closed his eyes.

"Verdomme."

That was all he said.

"A-Are you... o...kay...?" Matthew asked. He noticed that Tim's coat was completely soaked in blood. The Canadian started to panic. He didn't know what to do. But what he knew, was that it would only get worse if they stayed here.

"Let me... take you home..." Matthew offered.

Tim just nodded. Matthew pulled Tim's arm over his shoulder, and they walked to his house. Matthew felt something strange in his chest as he was holding Tim's hand firmly. But he ignored it. Tim's health was way more important than the boy's feelings.

After a while, they finally reached Matthew's house.

He carefully pushed the door open, and helped Tim as he limped inside. The Dutch man coughed loudly, and Matthew watched terrified as he saw red splatters of blood coming out of the man's mouth.

"Tim!" he cried, deeply concerned. "I...I have to..." The smaller boy slowly walked to Tim and carefully, to prevent hurting him, he removed the blood-covered coat, and then his shirt.

Matthew gasped when he saw the deep wound on the other man's shoulder. The blood was still pouring out of it.

"W...We have to stop the bleeding..." Matthew didn't even have a clue what he had to do, he was most likely doing everything wrong, but... he couldn't just let Tim die.

He carefully pressed Tim's shirt on the wound. He heard how Tim hissed from the pain.

"I...I'm sorry..." Matthew whispered.

It was all his fault that his friend was now hurt like this...

To his relief, he saw that the bleeding slowed down a little.

"J...Just stay here..." Matthew ran to get the first-aid kit. He was stupid. Why couldn't he even protect himself? Now Tim was hurt, and only because of him...

He stormed back to the man, and carefully pressed the dressing against the wound. Then, he used a bandage to hold the dressing in place.

"You... I have to keep you warm..."

He lead Tim to the couch, and placed a blanket over him.

Then, Tim finally opened his mouth. "_Klootzak_!" he spat out.

"W...What...?" Matthew asked in confusion.

"Hn." The other man looked away. "Asshole. Not you. Fucking Russian." He stared at the ceiling.

"A-Are you warm enough?" Matthew asked. He was still deeply concerned.

Tim nodded. "I'm fine. Just go to sleep. I will stay here."

Matthew looked at his friend, and then stood up. "Are you sure you are okay?"

Tim nodded again.

"...okay. Just call me if you need something." Matthew walked away. At the door, he turned around. "Good night, Tim..."

"Hm. Good night...Matthijs."

Matthew ran upstairs, and went straight to his bedroom. What the hell was wrong with him? He felt something in his chest, and he didn't really know what it was. But what he knew, was that he shouldn't feel like this. His heart was racing beneath his skin, and he was trembling.

He quickly took his clothes off, and crawled in his bed. Kumajirou was already there, curled up, in a small, fluffy, white ball. Matthew pulled the bear close to him, and buried his nose in Kuma's fur. The cub was snoring lightly.

Matthew cursed silently at himself. The strange feeling in his stomach only got worse and worse, every time he thought about the tall man, who was downstairs on the couch. He didn't want to think about him anymore. He did not really like this feeling. But he couldn't help but worry, and be concerned. That the man was wounded was his fault, after all. And it hurt so much to think about it.

This man... When he saved him, Matthew realized it. He didn't think of Tim as a normal friend. There was more.

He was horrible. And he knew that. Horrible to fall for a guy. And Tim at that.

That man... had sacrificed his life for him. He was always nice to Matthew, though he didn't say much. He was quiet, smart and strong. And now... Matthew... felt this for him... He was in love with him.

Why did he have to do this to him? There was no way that Tim would love him back. Because there was no way that anyone would love him like that. And he was very, very sure that Tim had better things to do than worrying about Matthew's feelings. And besides that, Tim was handsome, no doubt at that. He could get every single girl he wanted. So why would he ever choose for Matthew?

The boy buried his whole face in Kumajirou's soft fur, and sobbed quietly, without a sound.

His thoughts were going through his head all the time, and didn't seem to stop...

He slowly drifted off in a deep sleep.

But when he woke up the next morning, and walked downstairs, his heart sank.

Because Tim was gone.


	4. Chapter 4

Matthew knocked on the door. He waited and waited, untill finally, Francis opened the door. The older man smiled, untill he saw Matthew's tear-stained face.

"Mon Mathieu! What's wrong, mon ami?"

Matthew wiped at his tears. "I... We..." He panicked. How could he explain this? He could never tell Francis about the accident with that creepy Russian...

"Come inside, Mathieu... Then you can explain it. Just calm down..."

Matthew walked inside, and put Kumajirou down. He turned around, and felt how Francis pulled him in a hug. He buried his face in the other's shoulder.

"M...My...T-Tim and I... We...We were..."

Francis softly stroked his hair. "Shhh, calm down, mon ami... What happened with Tim?"

"We... We were...somewhere... yesterday... and..."

Francis smiled. "So, you and Tim are together?"

Matthew immediately shook his head. "No! It's not like that! W-We're just friends!"

Francis grinned. "Of course, Mathieu. But.. Continue your story~"

"Eh... I... We were just walking, and suddenly..."

He could better make up a story, before Francis would ask too much, and he accidentally would tell him everything...

"T-There was a car. A-And... I almost got hit, untill T-Tim pushed me out of the way." That would do.

"Ah, what happened then, mon Mathieu?"

Matthew sighed. "H-He... He..."

He saw the big Russian man in front of him again, swinging the faucet pipe in his direction.

"He got hit instead."

He buried his face in Francis' chest, and cried loudly. Francis held the younger boy tightly, while he cried.

"I-I... I took him home, and... t-tried to h-help him, but... when I woke up, he... he was gone..."

Francis stroked Matthew's back. "Ah, mon ami, I'm sure you will find him somewhere..."

"B-But... I've tried to find him for hours!"

Francis grinned. "Have you tried looking at Gilbert's? I'm sure he will be there... He lives there, after all, untill he has enough money for his own house..."

Matthew's face lit up. "Really? Thank you so much, papa!" He gave Francis a big hug, and smiled brightly. "Come, Kuma! Let's go find him!"

Matthew picked the polar bear up, and walked to the door. Then, he turned around.

"Eh... Where exactly does he live?"

After a while, Matthew found it. He had followed the directions Francis had given him, and now he stood here, in front of a big house. He knocked on the door. After a while, someone opened it. Matthew looked up, and saw a tall, muscular man. His blond hair was slicked back, and his blue eyes looked like they were looking straight through Matthew.

"Eh... H-Hello..." Matthew said.

"Hm? Strange... I thought I heard someone..." the other man said in a deep voice.

"Eh... I...I'm here..."

The man wanted to close the door, but a white hand stopped him. "Mattie!"

Matthew immediately recognised the rasping voice. "G-Gilbert!"

"Bruder... Who is this?" the blond man asked.

"This is the awesome Matthew!" Gilbert turned to the younger boy. "Come inside!" He grabbed Matthew's arm and dragged him inside, to the living room. There, Matthew was relieved to see Feliciano sitting on the couch.

"You are safe!" the Italian boy shouted, while he rushed to Matthew to hug him. "I'm so glad~!"

"W-What happened with you, and the others?"

"Vee, I was talking to that guy, Yao, and suddenly, I heard fratello screaming that the guy in the house was a killer, and I got scared and my heart couldn't take it anymore, vee... And I woke up at home and Lovino told me that he had seen a weird room with blood and when he ran outside, I was lying on the grass and he took me home while Gilbert was fighting with Yao and escaped with us. And this morning when I went to Luddy's house I saw that Tim was here too, vee."

Matthew smiled, glad that all of his friends were safe.

"Hey, ehm... Martin..."

Matthew turned around. "Matthew," he corrected the blond man.

"Oh. I'm sorry, Melvin. But... I was wondering... What exactly is your purpose here?"

"Eh...I'm Matthew... But I was looking for Tim, ehehe..."

"Hm. I see. I'm sorry, Marco. But he isn't here at the moment. He is somewhere with his sister. I don't exactly know where..."

"Oh. I see," Matthew answered. "I will go home then."

He didn't really like it when others did things like that... He was sure that the other man was nice, but still... He just kept forgetting his name, even after Matthew said it just a few seconds ago...

He was already on his way to the door, when Gilbert grabbed his arm.

"Mattie, why don't you stay here?" He grinned. "You can wait untill Tim is back, with Ludwig and Feliciano. I will take care of you~"

Matthew looked at him. His dark red eyes were friendly, but there was still a playful twinkle in his eyes. Matthew nodded, hoping that he would act normal.

Gilbert threw an arm over his shoulder, and smirked.

But suddenly, he fell backwards with a loud scream. "AAAARGH!"

"That's what you get, stupid bitch!"

Matthew jumped in surprise. He had completely forgotten Kumajirou, who was now growling, the fur around his mouth a bit bloody.

Gilbert was lying on the ground, clutching his hand.

Kumajirou struggled to get free of Matthew's grasp, and the boy quickly pushed him in the blond man's arms.

Matthew went to sit on his knees next to the albino, and took his hand in his own. The wound wasn't very deep, but it was still bleeding.

He stood up quickly, and ran to look for some bandages, Ludwig following him. But right when he ran around the corner, he bumped into someone, and fell on the ground with a loud thud.

He looked up, and saw to his surprise that there was a man in front of him. He gasped when he recognized the man.

"...Matthijs."

Matthew wanted to jump up and run away as fast as he could, but Tim's stare paralyzed him. He didn't even notice when Kumajirou jumped out of Ludwig's arms, and stood in front of Matthew, growling loudly at Tim.

The Dutch man didn't seem to mind, even when the cub bit his leg. He only kept staring at Matthew.

The Canadian slowly stood up after a while, not losing eye contact. Untill finally, he looked behind him, to search for Ludwig's protection. But the man was already gone to continue his search for bandages.

Now there was only one option left. To run. So Matthew quickly ran past Tim, without even looking at him.

But before he could reach the door, he felt a strong hand closing around his arm.

"What do you think you're doing?" Tim growled.

Matthew turned around, and stared at the other with big eyes. He almost started to cry again. Damn. He was so weak! But he just couldn't face Tim after last night, when he finally realized his feelings. It was strange. A few minutes ago, he just needed to see the man, but now, when he was finally here, Matthew couldn't even say a word...

He tried his hardest to hold his tears back, but it was hopeless. Just like Matthew himself.

Suddenly, he felt himself being pulled back, against the man's muscular chest. He struggled to escape, but those strong arms held him tightly.

"Why are you running away?" Tim growled.

"I-I'm not!" Matthew shouted. But they both knew that he was lying.

Tim turned Matthew around, so he could look him in the eyes.

"Tell me!" he yelled. "Why are you avoiding me!?"

Matthew wanted to step back, but Tim's arms stopped him. "I...I..." he stammered. There was no way he could tell the other about his true feelings.

"Matthijs..." Tim sighed. "I don't know what I've done wrong. But the next time, just tell me instead of acting so strange."

Matthew swallowed, and then he nodded. He didn't really know what else to do, he just wanted to escape and run away as fast as he could.

"Are you scared of me? Is that it?"

The boy quickly shook his head. It wasn't like that at all! He just... he just...

He couldn't hold himself back and threw himself in Tim's arms. He sobbed in the older man's shoulder, clinging to him tightly. His tears streamed down his cheeks, as he cried loudly.

He felt how the other man wrapped his arms around him, and held him. Tim whispered soft words in his ear. Matthew didn't know what they meant, but he didn't care. It made him calmer, so it was fine.

"_Ik heb je lief_," the tall man whispered.

Matthew leaned his head against his shoulder, and tried to control his breath. After a while, he had finally calmed down. He looked up at Tim, and swallowed, before he opened his mouth.

"What does that mean?"

But the man immediately pushed the smaller boy away. "Nothing," he said, in his usual, cold voice. "And... I would appreciate it if you would leave, kid."

Matthew stared at him in disbelief. How could he say that after everything that had just happened?

"W...Why...?" he said softly, not even sure if Tim had heard it.

"LEAVE!" Tim suddenly spat out.

Matthew quickly nodded, and he started to cry again. He didn't even think about Kumajirou, who ran outside after Tim's outburst.

He stormed outside, and rushed home. But he couldn't see clearly, because of his tears... He couldn't see where he drove... Not that it mattered, because the only thing that mattered right now was that he would be as far away from Tim as possible...

Francis looked up when he heard the sound of a car slamming on its brakes. He jumped up, and ran outside. He felt his knees buckle, and he fell on the ground, when he saw it. It was Matthew's car, that had crashed against a tree.


	5. Chapter 5

_I'm sorry that this took so long to write. I was kinda busy with stuff, and... I didn't even know how to write anymore ^^ Don't worry, I won't stop writing this story untill it's done. Even if it takes longer than I intended. _

_This chapter is divided in two parts, the first one from Mattie's view and the second from Neddy's. So that's why this chapter is longer than the others. Tell me what you think!  
_

* * *

Everything was black. His sight... but also his heart. His memories weren't. He could remember every single word that had ben said. The moment had been replayed in his head for too many times already... And he wanted it to stop... But right when the worst part was over, everything would start again... From the moment when he saw Tim again untill he ran outside... But what had happened after that? He couldn't even remember anything after he got into his car...

Suddenly, the vision of the memory faded away, and then everything went black once again. It took him a few moments to realize that his eyes were closed. He also felt something warm on his hand. It felt oddly familiar.

He slowly opened his eyes, and was greeted by a familiar face. A man with long, blond hair looked at him, his blue eyes sparkling in relief.

"Mathieu!"

He kissed Matthew's forehead.

"Pa...pa..." the boy whispered. He turned his head to look at Francis. "W...What happened?"

"Mon Mathieu...You are okay... I thought you were never going to wake up..."

Francis wrapped his arms around him and wanted to pull him close, but Matthew stopped him when the pain shot through his body.

"What happened?" he asked again, this time a little louder.

Francis sighed. "Euh...I was just at home, when suddenly I heard a car...crashing. So I went outside, to check what happened, and...I saw that it was...your car. And I took you to the hospital, because you were unconscious, and you were bleeding."

Somehow, that didn't surprise Matthew at all.

"W-Where is Kuma?" he asked.

Francis pointed at Matthew's feet. The bear was lying there, curled up on the white sheets. It was now that Matthew realized he was in a hospital bed. And then he felt the anger build up inside of him. He wasn't angry at Tim for being like that to him. He was angry at himself. For being so stupid. So stupid to show Tim his true feelings. That must be why Tim had acted like that. Of course he wasn't interested in Matthew like that.

"...thieu..."

He got snapped out of his thoughts by Francis' voice.

"Mathieu, you're hurting me..."

Matthew quickly released Francis from his tight grasp. He then continued to just stare at the ceiling, a few tears falling from his eyes.

He felt how Francis' hand cupped his cheek gently.

"Mon Mathieu... There is no need to cry... Everything will be allright..."

Oh, if only he knew...

"I will leave now. Your leg is broken, your hand bruised and there's a wound in your head. You need rest." Francis kissed Matthew's forehead again, this time a bit longer than usually.

He must have been very worried, Matthew thought. And he hated himself a bit more because of how he acted. He was just annoying Francis with his behaviour...

"Papa?" he whispered, right before the Frenchman reached the door. He turned around.

"What is it, mon Mathieu?"

Matthew sighed, and stared at Kumajirou, who was in Francis' arms, before looking back at Francis' face. "Thank you."

"It was no problem." Francis smiled gently, before turning around and closing the door behind him.

Matthew spent the next week in the hospital. He felt very lonely when there were no visitors, but when there were any, he just told them to go away. He didn't know what to do with himself. But despite of that, Francis visited him everyday, together with Kumajirou, of whom he took care now. Gilbert visited him too, together with Ludwig, who kindly apologized for everything that had happened, even though it wasn't even his fault. Also Feliciano, and even Lovino visited him, Feliciano giving him a nice bouquet of flowers. But he hadn't heard from Tim, not even once. The only thing he heard about him was from Gilbert, who told Matthew that Tim had moved in with his sister, Charlotte. Matthew felt betrayed. It was Tim's fault that he...NO! How could he ever think that!? It was his own fault, for being so stupid as to show him his true feelings!

Those kind of thoughts were in his head the whole time he was lying there, in the white bed. He was relieved when he was finally allowed to go home. He could finally get some distraction.

He promised himself he would forget about Tim. To completely deny his existance. Not to hurt him, of course not! But he did it because he didn't want to bother him anymore. He was just a stupid bitch, the only thing he could do was whine!

Tim, a strong man, who even protected him... It hurt Matthew to think that he would never see him again. But he had to do it. For Tim. Matthew had to pay him back by doing this.

Francis insisted on taking him to his house, so he could take care of him there.

So, after a while Matthew got out of Francis' car, and walked to the house. It felt strange to finally be able to do everything he wanted, after having to lie in that hospital for so long..

When he went inside, he walked to the couch, and sat down there, just staring at his lap. He didn't even look up when Francis walked into the living room, with a plate of pancakes in his hands. He felt how Kumajirou climbed on his lap, and softly bit his hand to get attention, but he ignored it.

"Mon Mathieu... Are you okay? You look so down..." Francis asked, concerned.

"I'm fine," Matthew grumbled. He knew, he told himself to forget everything, but he just couldn't. Not after everything that had happened...

"Are you sure, Mathieu? I don't really believe you when you look like this..."

"YES! I'M FINE!" Matthew spat out. He immediately regretted it when he saw Francis' shocked face.

"I...I'm sorry, papa...It's just..."

He pushed the polar bear off of him, and crawled in Francis' lap.

"I'm sorry...for everything... I'm such an idiot..." He buried his face in the older man's chest, as he held him tightly.

"Everything is my fault. I was just so glad that I had finally found a real friend, and then I...I act like this... I know that he hates me.. I can't stand it, papa. I was sad, so I hugged him, and... I only wanted some comfort... I didn't even think about the fact that he likes his personal space, and that not everyone can touch him... let alone hug him... But I was just so frustrated at that time... And he yelled at me, and that's when I ran outside and drove away. I was crying, and... that's when I crashed, I guess... I'm just so stupid..."

Francis softly stroked the younger boy's hair. "It's allright, Mathieu... Everything will be allright... Mon petit Mathieu... All you need is just some love..."

Matthew looked up, and suddenly noticed that Francis' face was very close to his own. A little too close. He knew where this was going.

Francis looked at him with an asking look in his eyes. He was waiting for Matthew to make a move.

Matthew hesitated for a moment. If he did this, he couldn't go back. But then he realized his promise to himself. It would be good to have some distraction, and besides that, Francis wasn't unattractive... And Matthew always felt comfortable around him... So he closed his eyes, and pressed his lips on Francis' soft ones. He felt how the other ran his hand through his hair, and Matthew forgot all of his worries and problems.

Francis softly licked his lower lip to ask for entrance, and Matthew parted his lips a bit. The Frenchman slipped his tongue inside, and softly brushed it against Matthew's.

He tastes nice, Matthew thought. Like wine, and French food...

After a while, Francis released Matthew. "Je t'aime," he whispered, while resting his forehead against Matthew's. "I...I love you too..."

Francis softly kissed Matthew again, and then pulled the other close to him. He kept stroking Matthew's hair and patting his back, untill he heard soft snoring. He smiled at the small boy, his new love. He kissed the boy's forehead, and then closed his eyes too.

* * *

Tim stared at the door. Matthew just left, running and crying. He gritted his teeth. He didn't even know why he was doing this. Matthew was the first person who hadn't ran away screaming, the first time he saw him. And now he had ruined it. Maybe... Matthew would have been his real friend if he hadn't been mean like that. But... he had finally told Matthew how he felt for him, finally he had built up the courage, but then... Matthew didn't understand it... Everything was just so frustrating!

He felt something tugging at his hair, but he just ignored it. He sighed. Maybe he would just get himself something to drink, a beer maybe, or two, or three...

"AAAH!" he shouted, when he felt a piercing pain in his ear. He growled when he saw that his Nijntje had bitten him.

"Verdomme!" he yelled. He glared at the bunny with a stern look, but then his gaze softened. "Yeah... You're probably right..."

He quickly petted the bunny's soft back, before he went to the living room and plopped down on the couch.

Nijntje hopped around on his chest, before lying down. Tim patted her, absent-minded. He just couldn't get the sight of Matthew's hurt and shocked eyes out of his head.

Softly, he sang a song. He could do that, because the others were being worried about that annoying albino kid, so they wouldn't hear him...

"_Een man weet niet wat ie mist, weet niet wat ie mist, een man weet niet wat ie mist... Een man weet niet wat ie mist, maar als ze er niet is, als ze er niet is, weet een man pas wat ie mist..._"

He sighed again. This was a stupid song, at least at this moment... Because he really was missing him. He just didn't know how he should tell him that...

He was akward with words. He knew himself good enough to see that. He was akward with expressing himself in general. People kept telling him that he looked stern, angry or even scary... When someone did that, he would usually just reply with "That's the easiest for my face" and then walk away.

He felt like there was only one living being on earth who could understand him, and that was his Nijntje... Maybe that was one of the reasons why he was so possessive over the bunny... He could still remember the day when he got her.

It was when he was still depressed, and using drugs to escape everything. His sister Charlotte had told him that he had to change. And after a while, he realized that he really had to. His parents had died when they were still young, so that was why Tim had to take care of his younger sister... and he couldn't do it when he was like that... That was when Charlotte gave Nijntje to him. At first he didn't even want the bunny, but after a while he realized that it helped to tell her about his problems. Even though she didn't say anything back. Then again, Tim also didn't talk that much...

He snapped out of his thoughts when he heard Gilbert's rasping voice yelling something. He sighed in annoyance. That idiot really couldn't keep his mouth shut for a minute, could he?

When the shouting didn't stop, he decided to go look. It was getting more annoying every second...

He grabbed a beer on the way, and drank it while he walked upstairs.

"Be silent, I can't even think!" he yelled at the albino. He was crying. Great. Another problem. "What the hell is wrong now?"

Ludwig looked up. "Minho..."

"Matthew," Gilbert corrected between his sobs.

"Yeah, that guy, he...had an accident. Francis called us to tell us that."

Tim didn't even realize that he had dropped his beer. All he could do was just stare at Ludwig.

"Francis took him to the hospital. They are looking at him now. He should be fine..."

But Tim didn't even hear that last sentence. He paced out of the room and didn't stop untill he found himself in front of his sister's house. He hesitated a moment, but then he knocked on the door.

After a while, a girl with blond, wavy hair that fell on her shoulders, opened the door.

"Timmie?"

She was wearing a pink apron, so she was most likely cooking something.

"Charlotte," Tim said, just staring at her.

"Did you forget something?"

Tim shook his head.

"Then... Why are you here? What's wrong?"

Tim still didn't say a word. He was kinda relieved when Charlotte pulled him in a hug. He buried his face in the smaller girl's hair.

"Ehm... Timmie?" she asked after a few moments. "I have to continue with making dinner, you can stay in the kitchen, if you want. Do you also want some food?"

Tim nodded. He didn't even want to, but he had to eat, or else Charlotte would only become more worried. So he sat down and waited for her.

He ate with a heavy stomach. When he was done, he walked to the couch in the living room and sat down. He felt how Charlotte went to sit next to him, and he leaned his head on her shoulder.

"Lot... I met a boy. And I think... he means more to me than most people. And I hurt him. I yelled at him. Because I was uncomfortable. He hugged me, and he was crying. And I didn't know what to do, so I told him 'ik heb je lief'. But of course he didn't know that it meant 'I love you'. So he asked what I meant, and then I suddenly didn't know how to say it anymore. I yelled at him to go away. And then I heard that he had an accident..."

"Oh..." Charlotte said softly. She patted her brother's head.

"I don't want to go back to that house anymore, Lot."

"Too much memories, hm? Well then, why don't you stay here? I don't mind~" She smiled her cat-like smile again. "I will call Lud, and then tell him that you will stay here. Okay?" She kissed Tim's forehead, and then walked away.

Tim stayed with her for the rest of the week. He couldn't bring himself to go to Matthew. He just couldn't. Because if he did... he would only mess it up...

After a week, Charlotte forced him to go outside, to prevent him from getting lazy. Or at least that was what she said. But they both knew that she wanted Tim to make some friends. So now Tim walked on the streets, alone. His hands in his pockets, his nose buried in his scarf. His cheeks were getting red from the cold. He already knew that this wasn't going anywhere. The other people just walked past him, without even looking at him. In fact, he didn't even want them to notice him.

He was lonely, that was true. But he only wanted one person. And he would never get him. He had ruined his chance.

He sat down on a small bench, just staring at the people that were walking by. He faintly noticed that someone went to sit next to him, but he ignored the other. As long as that person didn't touch him, it was fine.

The other coughed. "It's cold here, isn't it?"

Tim nodded. "Yeah..." He didn't really feel like talking to anyone.

"I just bought flowers. What's your favourite flower?"

He didn't know why the stranger was talking to him, but he guessed that it was normal in this country...

"Tulips," he answered.

He suddenly saw how a pale hand laid a flower in his lap. A tulip. He snapped his head towards the other, and there he was, beautiful as always, looking down at his lap. His golden hair with that strange curl, hiding his perfect face. "T-Tim..." he whispered.

"Y-You!" Tim shouted, and he jumped up.

Matthew looked at him, with sad eyes. "Hi, Tim."

The tall man just stood there, looking at the other with wide eyes.

"How are you? I just found a new love."

Wait...what? What did he just say? "W...What...?" he stammered.

"I said, I found a new love."

No...this couldn't be...not now... "W...Who...?" he managed to whisper.

"Papa... Francis."

Tim noticed how his breath was getting heavier. He almost lost himself.

"So you don't have to worry anymore. I'm not going to bother you anymore."

No...No! NO! It was now, or never! He had to say it!

"I LOVE YOU!"

* * *

_Wow. That... happened. I don't even know anymore. XD If you want to know which song Timmie was singing, it's "Als ze er niet is" by De Dijk. /watch?v=BPShpcJRNFg_

_And another song I was listening to while writing the end of this chapter /watch?v=8rs-Jd58fKk_

_I hope you enjoyed it! _


	6. Chapter 6

Matthew stared at the other man in disbelief. There was no way that he had heard that right. There was no way that the man, now trembling and panting, with clenched fists, could actually love him. Not even like him! And yet he stood here.

He could see that Tim was getting impatient already. "A...Are you...sure...?" he asked softly, with a trembling voice.

"OF COURSE I AM! YOU ARE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL PERSON I'VE EVER MET! INSIDE AND OUTSIDE!" Tim turned around and ran away, desperately trying to escape. This wasn't like him.

"Tim, wait!" he heard Matthew yelling. "Please...Please!"

Tim shook his head, and kept running. After a while, he ran around a corner of a building, and stopped there. He panted heavily. What the hell was wrong with him? Why was he acting like this? He couldn't even understand himself anymore. But deep inside, he already knew the answer. He was scared. Scared of being rejected. Scared of being left alone again. He was always such a coward!

He cursed loudly, and slammed his fist against the wall.

"Oi, bastard!" he suddenly heard.

"What the hell do you want," Tim growled. He was angry at everybody, and didn't want to talk to anyone, especially not that annoying Italian. So he had no other choice than to look up, glare at him and then walk away, with his hands buried in his pockets. But before he could take a few steps, he saw how Lovino jumped in front of him and started to yell at him, about how he couldn't just ignore him and walk away and all that shit.

"Why are you even talking to me?" Tim growled, while he shot a dark glare towards him.

"My idiot brother over there," Lovino pointed behind him with his thumb, "was too afraid to go to you, so I had to go." He turned around. "Damn it, Feli! Stupid coward! Get your ass over here!"

The younger boy appeared from behind a tree, with trembling legs. "I...I'm sorry...fratello..."

He took a few steps in their direction. "But...That...His eyes... He looks so scary..."

"Coward," Lovino sighed, and he pulled his brother closer.

"Vee...mister..."

The small boy hid behind his brother, but was still looking at Tim.

"What do you want?" the Dutchman growled. He really didn't mean to scare Feliciano, but he was just very irritated.

"Vee...I was...I...vee...I saw you...and you looked s-sad, vee... So I w-wanted to ask you if I could h-help with anything, vee..."

Tim shook his head. "I have to do this myself."

He wanted to walk away when he felt how Feli pulled at his coat. "But you could at least tell me what's wrong! Grandpa always told me that talking about your problems helps, vee! And I always tell fratello about my problems and it works and he does it too, I remember that time he told me he was in love with brother Antonio—"

Lovino immediately slammed his hand on Feli's mouth, his face turning a bright red. "Damn it, idiot! You're not supposed to say that, didn't I already make that clear!?"

"Veee! I'm sorry, fratello! I didn't mean to say it but it just happened before I even realized it, vee! Don't hurt me please! I will be a good boy, I promise!"

"Yeah. Whatever." Lovino now turned his gaze to Tim.

"And you!" he hissed. "I swear, if you tell anyone, I will rip your fucking balls off and feed them to your stupid bunny!"

Tim just stared at him. He couldn't care less about what the boy said. He knew that he could take him down with one finger.

"Vee, fratello, don't get angry at him..." Feliciano said softly, trying to calm his brother down. "He didn't do anything wrong, vee!"

Lovino groaned, and then looked away. "Fine. Bastards. Just hurry up. I don't want to stand here all day just to hear his fucking life story."

Feliciano nodded. "Vee! Let's go sit somewhere!" Feli tried to take Tim's hand, but the man just raised his hand. The Italian jumped to try to catch his hand, but he was too small. Untill finally he gave up, and pouted.

"No touching," Tim growled.

"But..."

"No." He walked to a bench and sat down there. Feliciano went to sit next to him.

"Vee... Why aren't you smiling?"

"I have no reason to smile," Tim said. "I just think it's tiring."

Feliciano looked at him, shocked. "B-But... Smiling is good! I always try to make fratello smile, and he looks a lot happier when he does!"

Then his face became serious. "Vee, let's see... A good reason to smile..." He stared into the distance for a while, and suddenly his face lit up. "You have a sister, sì?"

Tim nodded.

"Try to think of her!"

He did, but his expression didn't change.

"Vee...That didn't work..." Feliciano sighed. "Wait. Do you have someone you love very much? Someone you want to share all of your secrets with? Want to protect with your life? Even if it means that you have to give up everything?"

"Oi, Feliciano! You are becoming too smart, damn it!" could be heard from the distance.

Tim just stared at the boy, who looked like he was just having a random conversation with someone about pasta or something like that.

"I...I actually had someone like that. Or at least I thought that I had someone. But it turned out that he already has someone. And..." Tim fell silent. It wasn't that strange that Matthew had chosen Francis instead of him. He had only seen Tim a few times, while he had known Francis for almost his whole life.

Suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder. He expected it to be Feliciano's, but when he looked up, he saw that it was Lovino's. He looked at the Italian confused. He didn't expect him to do something like that...

"Hey. Bastard. I know how that feels. And... listen... You probably want to kill that other bastard. Just know that if you do, you won't get away with it."

"That's why we are here," Feliciano continued. "We, from the mafia, can always protect you! Even though we are a small group, vee...And we are not that good...But we still want to help you! Luddy, and brother Gil, and Ma...Me...Mo..."

He thought for a moment, with his finger on his chin. "Matthew, vee!"

Tim sighed. "That is the one I'm talking about."

"Vee? You like Matthew?"

Tim nodded. He didn't even know why he was telling Feliciano this. But he seemed like a good person to talk to.

"Vee, I will help you! He seems to care a lot about you, vee! When he was at Luddy's house a few weeks ago he immediately asked for you! What makes you think that he doesn't like you, vee?"

Tim sighed again. "I talked to him a few minutes ago. And he... He told me..."

"TIIIIIIIM!"

Tim stood up quickly. He knew whose voice that was...

"Tim!"

There he stood. Matthew...His Matthew... running towards him, yelling his name.

"TIM!" Matthew jumped, and threw himself in Tim's arms. "I'm so sorry..." he sobbed.

Tim didn't move for a second, not knowing what to do, but then he wrapped his arms around Matthew, and hugged him tightly. The boy buried his face in Tim's chest, crying.

The tall man akwardly petted his hair. He wasn't really used to people touching him...

Suddenly, he saw Feliciano standing behind Matthew, pointing at him and then pursing his lips. After that he ran away, dragging Lovino with him.

Tim tilted Matthew's head up with his thumb under his chin. He didn't really know what to do, so he would just do that stuff they always did in movies...

He cupped Matthew's face, and wiped his tears away with his thumbs, looking him in his beautiful, shining, violet eyes.

"I'm s-so s-sorry... I-I thought that you h-hated me..." Matthew sobbed.

Tim shared at him, shocked. He couldn't even imagine that someone could hate his Matthew! "Matthijs..." he whispered. "It's okay. Just... just go to that Francis of yours, if that's what makes you happy. You don't have to stay here for me, really."

"No!" Matthew only clinged to him tighter. "I love you, Tim! I really love you! I'm sorry that I said all those things, really!"

He stood on his toes, and kissed Tim's cheek, blushing a bit.

"Hey, Matthijs..." Tim looked down at Matthew's face. "You said that you now belong to that Francis. We shouldn't do this!" He did want it, really, but it wasn't worth it if Matthew already had someone.

"I don't care," Matthew whispered. "We can keep this a secret. Nobody has to know."

"Are you...sure?" Tim asked, while he let his hands rest on Matthew's hips. He didn't want to be responsible if Matthew got hurt.

The Canadian nodded firmly. "I'm very sure." He took Tim's hand. "But we can't do it here, or in my house, because then we could be seen..."

Tim nodded. "Let's go to my sister's house. That's where I live at the moment. I don't know if she's home, but I'm sure that she will understand..." He kissed Matthew's forehead quickly, and turned around. "Follow me. Keep a safe distance." He walked away quickly.

Matthew had to try his hardest not to run to him. He just wanted to be as close to Tim as possible. But... what if somebody saw him? It would be very, very bad if Gilbert or Antonio saw him with Tim, and even worse if Arthur or Alfred would spot him! They would tell Francis for sure! While he wanted to be with Tim, he didn't want to hurt Francis. Because he was so nice, and friendly...

After a while they reached a small house. Tim turned around, and opened his arms. Matthew saw that he hesitated a little, and he chuckled. Tim was a cool, big guy from the outside, but he was so shy when it came to love!

He slowly walked to him, and reached his arms out to hug Tim, but before he could even touch him, the man had gripped Matthew's hips firmly, and lifted him up. The boy had to wrap his legs around Tim's waist to prevent himself from falling.

* * *

_Guys. Guys. This fanfiction is rated M. That means that there will be 'something' happening at one moment. And that moment is now. So if you do not wish to read two males having sex, don't continue. Thank you._

* * *

Tim walked inside the house, but they didn't get really far. When the door closed, Matthew got pressed against the wall with his back.

He gasped when he felt Tim's lips on his own soft ones. He closed his eyes, wrapping his arms around the other's neck. He tilted his head a little bit, and moved his lips to kiss back.

But Tim's lips moved away from his. Without losing contact, he kissed Matthew's jaw, and then moved to his neck. He kissed it down, and unbuttoned his shirt with one hand, still supporting Matthew with his other. He licked his collarbone, and moved down to his chest.

Matthew had turned a bright red now. Tim moved further down, now only holding the Canadian's hips pinned to the wall. He trailed his hands down his hips, and started to unzip the boy's pants.

"N-Not fair..." Matthew said softly. His voice was barely a whisper now.

"Hm? What is it?" Tim looked up at Matthew, while he tugged at his pants.

"You...You still have your...clothes on ..."

Tim chuckled. It was the first time that Matthew really saw him smile. "Well... I won't stop you," he said teasingly.

Matthew pouted. "But...But...I..." He was way too shy to just undress someone!

"You already did it before, remember?"

Matthew looked at Tim. He remembered it now. That time when Tim had saved him from the Russian, and Matthew had to take care of his wound... "You...You won't mind?"

Tim cupped Matthew's face, and kissed his lips gently. "Of course not, _mijn konijntje_..."

"W...What..?"

Tim grinned. "My bunny."

Matthew's face turned even redder at those words. He pulled Tim's shirt up, to reveal his muscular body. He trailed his hand over Tim's chest and stomach. The white scar was still on Tim's shoulder. Matthew stood on his toes, and kissed it softly.

Suddenly, Tim scooped the Canadian up and carried him upstairs. They lost the rest of their clothes on the way. Matthew was clinging to Tim as they went into the bedroom. They landed on the bed with a loud thud. The Dutchman sucked at the skin on Matthew's neck.

Then he looked at the boy's face.

"W...What are you doing...?" Matthew asked curiously.

Tim stared at the boy's curl for a moment, before pulling at it. Matthew couldn't hold back a moan. When the other pulled it again, and then twirled it around his finger, he grinded his hips against Tim's.

The older man grinned. "So... That's what this thing does..."

He pulled it another time, before kissing Matthew on the lips. He then kissed his neck, chest and stomach, before placing a small kiss on the tip of his member. A shudder went through the younger boy's body.

Tim took the tip inside, and then started to suck on it. The younger boy arched his back, and started to moan softly.

"T-Tim, I...nnnghh..." He couldn't even say a proper sentence.

Matthew closed his eyes and let himself sink into the pleasure Tim was giving him. When he felt like he almost couldn't take it anymore, everything suddenly stopped.

"Are you ready, mijn konijntje?"

Matthew opened his eyes. "I...don't know..."

He suddenly felt how something got pressed against his entrance.

"Eh...I...eh...I have never..." the boy confessed.

"Neither have I," Tim said, with a confident grin. "Just relax. I will stop if I have to." He slowly pushed inside, constantly checking his lover's expression. When he saw that he felt uncomfortable, he stopped moving for a while, and when he relaxed, he pushed a bit further. When he was done, he waited for the Canadian to adjust. After he heard a whispered "Y-You can m-move..." he started to thrust.

Holding onto Matthew's hips, Tim tried to find his 'sweet spot'. When he had found a good pace, he started to pump Matthew's member in time with his thrusts.

The boy panted more with each thrust, untill he finally let out a scream. "T-There!" he screamed. Tim hit him right in the same spot, earning another loud scream.

He slammed into the boy a few more times, untill he started to feel a strange tightness building up inside of him.

"Eh...T-Tim... I'm g-gonna..."

The man nodded. "That's...That's fine..." He felt that he was coming close too.

After a few thrusts, he felt how Matthew's walls tightened around him, and the younger man's body started to shudder. It didn't take long for Tim to reach his climax too.

Panting heavily, he pulled out of Matthew, and collapsed next to him. Damn... This took more energy than he had thought...

He pulled the boy close. "You are beautiful, do you know that?"

Matthew buried his face in Tim's chest. "You are the handsome one..." he mumbled.

Tim grinned, and kissed the boy's head. "Good night," he whispered.

"Yeah. I love you."

Soon, they were both too exhausted to even keep their eyes open any longer, and they fell asleep.

* * *

_I'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooo sorry guys! Soooooo sorry that this took sooooooooo damn long! But yeah, like I already said on my Nostalgia... Life's getting in the way. Shit's going on, and most of the time I don't really feel like writing. But don't hate me please! Also don't lose hope, I WILL finish this story! Hmm, I hope you enjoyed it! Keehee, hope you liked the... M-rated part... kehehehe... *won't tell you that my teacher actually read a small part...luckily not the... 'bad' part... *_


	7. Chapter 7

_Warnings: Contains a very scary person. You don't want to meet him. You really don't. Unless you're one of my crazy friends. Yes. I'm also one of them. I want his autograph._

* * *

"Hmmmm..." Matthew felt something warm around him. He didn't open his eyes yet, not wanting to lose the feeling of his dream...

That was the best dream someone could ever have... He could still remember the green eyes of the man in his dream, filled with lust and love...His pink lips, chapped because of the cold weather, but not making him any less attractive... His strong hands, roaming over Matthew's body...

Suddenly, there was a soft groan. Matthew opened his eyes, and there was his dream, sleeping peacefully, his chin resting on the Canadian's hair, his arms loosely wrapped around him. The younger boy reached up, and removed a few strands of hair from Tim's face. He chuckled. Tim was so cute when he let his hair down!

He saw how the strong man twitched a bit, and then opened his eyes, yawning. "Goedemorgen, mijn konijntje."

Matthew blushed again. "Eh...Good morning, Tim... My bear," he added, chuckling.

"What..." Tim thought for a moment, but then he smiled.

"Ehehe..." Matthew smiled back. Then he opened his mouth again. "Why is it that you don't smile that much?"

Tim immediately stopped. "Because I won't smile if I have no reason to."

"Eh... but... you should smile more!"

Tim shook his head. "I don't want to smile if I have no reason to. I don't see the use of that. It's just tiring, and it won't get you anywhere. It is better to just keep a normal face. Smiling is way too much effort."

Matthew pouted a bit. "But it's good to smile... Eh... Do you have a reason to smile right now?"

Tim buried his face in the boy's neck, and Matthew could feel him smile against his skin. "Yes..." he whispered softly.

"Ehehe... That makes me happy~" The Canadian smiled.

"Tiiiiiiim!"

Tim looked up. There was a female voice, shouting at them from downstairs. "Tim, there's a weird thing here!"

The man pushed the covers off of him, and stood up. Matthew immediately turned red, seeing that he didn't have his clothes on yet... The Dutchman opened the door of the room, and wanted to walk downstairs, but Matthew stopped him. "Don't you...well...need to put some clothes on...?"

"Do I need to?" Tim turned, looking at Matthew.

"Eh...Well...eh...I don't mind, but... I thought..."

"If you don't mind, I'm fine. You can dress, if you want, but you don't have to."

The Canadian blushed darker at this. Then he pouted, and crossed his arms. "Tim, you are very weird. Do you really think I like it if everyone can see you? You have windows, you should think about that!"

Tim grinned. "You have no idea what I can see behind some windows when I go to a certain place in my country..."

Matthew immediately flushed at that. "I...I...eh...I..."

Tim started to laugh, before he walked back to his lover, and kissed him softly. "Don't you remember what I told you last night?" He then pressed his lips against Matthew's ear. "You are my first, and only one. Though I wouldn't mind to do it another time..."

The younger boy immediately pulled away, and buried his face under the blankets. He heard a soft chuckle above him. "Don't laugh at me..." he pouted.

"Hm. Only for you."

"Tiiiiiiiiiiiiim!"

Matthew heard how Tim slowly walked away. He stopped somewhere, and continued after a few moments. When the sound had faded away, the boy stood up. He saw that his clothes were folded up on a chair. But...that meant... "Mon Dieu..." he whispered. That must mean that Tim's sister...gathered the clothes they had lost on their way to the room...and actually went into the room while they were asleep...

Matthew blushed shyly at the thought, slightly embarrassed that something like that had happened.

"Oi, Matthijs!"

The Canadian quickly put his boxers on, and ran downstairs. He sighed in relief when he saw that Tim had done the same... But the sigh of relief quickly turned into a sigh of annoyance...

"Kuma!"

The cub was biting Tim's arm. Matthew quickly ran to him, and pulled the bear away. "Kuma! What are you doing!?"

"There you are, you bitch! I was hungry! Give me some fish! And who are you?"

Matthew sighed. "I'm sorry...Kuma...saburou..." He gently smiled down at the bear. "It was my fault to just run off..."

"Aaaaaawww!"

The boy jumped up, and quickly turned around. There was a girl with curly, dark blonde hair, held back by a green ribbon. She had sparkling, green eyes, the same colour as Tim's. She ran to Matthew, and pulled the cub out of his arms.

"He can talk! I was a bit scared of him at first, but he is so cuuuute!"

Matthew smiled shyly. "He isn't that cute though... Watch out, he likes to attack strangers..."

Kumajirou huffed. "I don't even know who you are, bitch! And yet you still think that you know me!"

"I'm Matthew, your owner..."

"Ah, that's right. You are the dumbass who gives me food..."

"He's so cute!" The girl rubbed her nose against Kuma's, smiling a smile that reminded Matthew a bit of a cat. Suddenly, she looked up. "Hey there, sweety~"

"Eh...Bonjour..." the Canadian whispered.

"Ahh! You spreak French too? That's so cute! Comment tu t'appelle?"

Matthew looked at her shyly. "I'm...Matthew..."

"He's my Matthijs," Tim suddenly said.

"That's so cute, Timmie! I can understand what you see in this boy! He is so cuuuute!"

The younger one coughed awkwardly.

"Oh! That's right! I'm Charlotte! You can call me everything you want~"

Tim suddenly grabbed Matthew's shoulder, and pulled him to the living room. It was a small room with just a few couches, a radio, and a television. Nothing more, nothing less. Matthew saw Tim's bunny sitting on the ground. She hopped towards Tim right when she saw him. Tim picked her up, and patted her head. "Hallo, Nijntje." He continued to talk to her in Dutch.

Matthew sighed, and sat down on a couch. When Tim saw that, he lied down on the same couch, with his head on his lover's lap. He didn't seem to mind that he was only wearing boxers...

Matthew softly patted Tim's head. "You look really...different, with your hair down..." he said quietly, running his hand through it. "I...If that's okay...I wanted to ask you something..."

"What is it?"

"H-How did you get that..." The boy ran his finger over the scar on Tim's forehead.

"This? I got this... when I was little. I was still young, and didn't know the dangers of life. So...One day, I got attacked. By a group of hooligans. Football people, I guess. They attacked me, and I could just barely escape... The only thing I got was this scar... I will never forget that day..."

"Really!?" Matthew asked, completely astonished. Tim chuckled a bit. "No. Actually, I got hit by a millblade. But that isn't a good stgory to tell people."

Matthew laughed a bit. "I guess so." He petted Tim's head again.

Then, Charlotte walked into the room, while feeding Kumajirou fish, still snuggling the bear.

"At least I get food here! How do you dare to leave me alone with that beard!?"

Matthew's eyes widened. "Oh shit... We have to tell papa..."

* * *

"So... You went to Tim's house..." The Frenchman looked at the two men in front of him. Matthew nodded. Tim glared back at the older man, not even blinking.

"And...What did you do there?"

Matthew turned a bright red, while Tim just kept his emotionless face. "I had sex with him," the Dutchman said, with a tone as if he was presenting the weather.

"Ah...I see..." Francis turned his gaze at Matthew, whose face was as red as if he was doing the act itself.

"Did you like it?"

The boy didn't know if he should feel embarrassed, scared, or guilty... Right now it was all of them. He thought for a while, and when he had finally built up enough courage, he nodded, even though it was barely visible.

"Hmm..." It was hard to see what Francis was thinking.

"You." He looked at Tim again.

"I-I'm so sorry!" Matthew suddenly shouted. "I-It was my fault, I'm sorry! Please, papa... Don't hurt him, it's my fault, and I—"

"Mathieu."

The youngest quickly bit his lip, small tears forming in his eyes. When Tim saw that, he started to growl. "Dare to hurt him, and I will rip your head off."

Francis looked at them both, before he started to smile. "Take good care of mon petit Mathieu."

"W-What!?" Matthew couldn't grasp the situation.

"I'm saying... by the things you two said just now, I can see that you love each other very much. And who am I, as a man from the country of love, to interrupt this true love~? Mon Mathieu, you should do what your heart tells you. If you really love this man, I won't stop you."

Matthew jumped up, and threw his arms around the Franchman's neck. "Thank you so much, papa... Merci, merci, merci!" He quickly kissed both of the man's cheeks, receiving a soft groan from Tim.

"Are you...Are you sure?" he asked, his voice quiet again.

"Oui. I'm sure. Just do what makes you happy." Francis ruffled the Canadian's hair. "And now go and be happy with him." He kissed Matthew's forehead, and then gently pushed him towards Tim. "I wish you the best~"

Matthew took Tim's hand. The tall man glanced at Francis once more, before they walked out of the room.

* * *

"We're there."

They walked into a big boat.

"What...is this place?" It smelled like...pancakes?

"You'll see." Tim let Matthew's hand go, and continued his pace. He led the boy into a place with many tables and chairs. A few families were sitting there, with their kids. The tall man led his boyfriend to one of the empty tables.

"This is...a...pancake boat...I guess..." Tim explained. "Uh...Lot said...that you liked...pancakes..." The usually expressionless face of the Dutchman was slowly turning a little red. It was seriously one of the cutest things Matthew had ever seen in his whole life.

"Yes~ I do~" He sat down next to his lover. "So...we can eat pancakes here?"

Tim nodded, his face still turned away from Matthew.

"Eh? Why are you not looking at me? Is...Is something wrong...?"

Truth to be told, Matthew loved how shy Tim looked. But he was also a bit afraid that he had done something wrong...

"N-No... It's just..." He sighed, and then turned his head to Matthew again. "Don't tell anyone here that you are my boyfriend."

The younger boy just wanted to ask him why, when he suddenly felt a hand around his leg. He shrieked, and jumped on Tim's lap. There was some other movement under the table, before a head popped out. It was a man, around 50 years old, Matthew guessed. He had curly hair, already gray on several places, and a huge grin on his face, making his...yellow...teeth clearly visible. The man looked at the two boys from behind his glasses.

"Hiiiiiii!"

"Ehm...mister...what were you doing under...the...table...?" Matthew managed to ask in a trembling voice, still shocked from the sudden appearance.

"This here is my pleasure spot!"

The Canadian's eyes widened. "Wa...WHAT!?"

The older man let out a loud laugh. Matthew was getting more scared with every move the man made, while Tim just sat there, staring out of the window like this was normal. The man stood up, both his thumbs high in the air. Maybe the man himself was high. On air. He didn't know.

"I'm Ed! And I'm the owner of...THREE PANCAKE BOATS!"

Matthew pressed his back against Tim's chest. "Uhm...well...Bonjour, Ed..."

The man laughed again, his body moving as if he was having a seizure.

"I'm here to make friends with my friend's..." He wiggled his eyebrows. "Boyfriend."

Matthew's cheeks turned red, while Tim's face had already regained his normal colour.

"I kept telling him that he had to find one. But he didn't listen, saying that he wasn't one for true love...But now he has found you...Pannenkoek~"

Did...that man just...call him pancake?

"I have to take my leave now, little Pannenkoek, I will be back~!"

Ed licked Matthew's face, before he galloped away, his arms and legs moving like he was riding an invisible horse.

"Who the fuck was that...?" Matthew asked, still in shock.

"Ah... He's the owner of this boat. He's a bit strange, but...you'll get used to it...eventually...I hope..." Tim wrapped his arms around Matthew, and held him close.

"But... I just thought you said..."

"He's going to tease us with it. Annoying man. But... Now that he knows it, there's nothing we can do about it." His lover snuggled into Matthew's neck. Tim was such a sweet, romantic man if he really wanted to! Matthew smiled softly at that thought.

"Oi...Mat..."

"Hm?"

"...What are we going to do after this...?"

The Canadian leaned his head against Tim's shoulder. "I don't know...To the beach, mabye?"

"Hm...If you say so..."

The next hour, Matthew stayed on Tim's lap, not wanting to take the risk of getting groped... They ate their pancakes in silence, both not being the type to talk much, and being forced to talk too much when Ed was around... Exhausted, they eventually left the restaurant.

Tim grabbed Matthew's hand again, as they walked on the beach. It was empty, since it was cold... Way more enjoyable, Tim thought... He didn't like crowds. Not at all. But he didn't mind anything, as long as he was together with Matthew.

He stopped after a few moments, and turned, to look at the sea. The waves were rolling over the sand, ending right at his feet.

"Damn...It's cold..." He pulled Matthew closer, letting his arm rest on the boy's shoulder. He felt the Canadian's arms closing themselves around his waist, and kissed the boy's forehead.

"Tim, I...I love you..."

"Yes. I know. I love you."

The Dutchman leaned down, and captured Matthew's lips with his own. They stayed like that for a long while, simply enjoying the other's actions. They watched the sun sink into the sea, Tim narrating what they saw into a poem.

It was already dark when they walked home, just talking and laughing at silly things. It was already late...

"Be quiet, Charlotte is already sleeping, I guess," Tim warned. Matthew nodded. It wasn't difficult to do that. Really, when wasn't he quiet..?

They went inside, past a sleeping Kumajirou who was curled up around Nijntje. Matthew smiled down at him, before he let himself be carried upstairs by Tim. After making themselves ready, they crawled into the bed they shared. The two lovers cuddled against each other, and soon fell asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

_**Shut up, I don't even wanna hear it  
Beg until your tears dry up  
I will see the end of this, just watch  
You messed with the wrong person**_

_**We were in love  
and I only had her  
But why, why did you  
touch my girl – no way**_

_**I brush myself off and get up  
As much as I suffered, you just watch  
You mess with love,  
you mess with friendship – just watch**_

_**Just at the thought of you,  
my body shakes  
I can't forgive you – from now on -**_

_**It's war, you coward  
just watch  
You made her cry again  
You coward,  
you you you, who messed with my love  
It's war**_

**-MBLAQ**_** – It's War**_

* * *

_Translation tiiiiiime~! / I will only translate the less common ones. (Aka Dutch. Nobody knows Dutch. Hrrr )_

_Onderbroekenlol: Underpantsfun .-. -sounds better in Dutch- _

_Laat me niet lachen: Don't make me laugh (sarcastic) _

_Vaarwel: Goodbye/farewell_

* * *

It was already early in the afternoon when Matthew finally woke up, to find that Tim was already gone. He stood up, dressed himself and walked downstairs... but he froze as soon as he set a foot in the living room. His lover stood there, his back turned to him...and completely naked.

"T-Tim, what are you..." He couldn't even finish his sentence. Tim turned around, and had, to Matthew's utter horror, his boxers over his head. His eyes were half shut, and red.

"A-Are you...okay...?"

The man went closer to him, and placed his lips on Matthew's ear, making the Canadian blush a bit. "W-What are you doing...?"

"Listen..." the Dutchman whispered, sending a shudder down the boy's spine. Matthew concentrated himself, expecting a message.

"Onderbroekenlol!"

Matthew's eyes widened at that strange word, and he stepped back. He wondered if he even wanted to know what it meant. "Hey... Tim, why don't you just sit down and rest for a bit?"

"Ah, the colours..."

The tall man wrapped his arms around his lover, and let his chin rest on the boy's head.

"Tim, are you okay?"

"Never been this good in my whole life...Haha...Whole...Whore...Hahaha..."

Matthew stared at the other with a worried expression. "Just...sit down first, please..." He gently pushed Tim in the direction of the chair, but the older man stayed on his place. "Hey, Mat... You should see this too... The colours are so...great..."

"Tim. You haven't been doing drugs, have you?"

Tim just looked at his boyfriend, his mouth hanging open a bit. "No. What makes you think that?"

"Yes, you did." He could see it from the way the other looked and acted.

"No, I-"

"Tim! You go and sit down, right now!"

The older man moved to sit down, but ended up on the floor instead. Matthew helped him up and pushed him on the couch, before he put his hands on his hips. "Now. Tell me. Why did you do this?" He tried to look the other in the eyes, but it didn't seem to work, so he grabbed his chin.

"Because I had them..."

"And who gave them to you?"

A hand on Matthew's cheek was his answer, but the Canadian angrily slapped it away. "Tell me!"

"A...you know...that guy handed it to me, under the table..."

The younger of the two looked at him in confusion. "You mean... that Ed guy?"

Tim nodded, and pulled Matthew in his lap. The latter wanted to go away, but Tim's strong arms stopped him. "T-Tim, let me-"

"What is going on here?"

The two turned their heads, to see a certain Frenchman walking in.

"P-Papa!" Matthew wanted to go to Francis, but Tim still had his arms around him.

"What's going on?" Francis asked again, putting one hand on his hip.

"Ah, the colours..."

"SHUT UP!" the Canadian shouted. He was really starting to get frustrated. Not at Tim...just...actually, yes.

"Why is he acting like that?" the oldest of the three asked. It was silent for a while, nobody knew what to say, until the Dutchman suddenly bursted out in laughter. That was the clue for Francis to grab Matthew's arm, and pull him away from Tim. After a bit effort he was able to release the boy from his lover's arms, and he took him to the hall. There, he pressed the shorter boy against the wall, and looked him straight in the eyes.

"Listen, Mathieu. You shouldn't be here any longer. Actually, you shouldn't be with him at all anymore."

Matthew's eyes widened at this. "But Papa! I love him, he loves me-"

"I can't take the risk that this happens again. Maybe the next time it's not only with him, but with you too."

"What? That won't happen! Please, Papa! I will make sure that he's never going to do this again!" He faintly noticed that he was almost sounding like a kid now, but right now he couldn't care less.

"Come on, Mathieu. You don't like to see him like that, do you?"

"I'm not saying that I like it! But... please, give me a chance! Give us a chance!"

"Maybe later. But not now. Right now we need to find someone to take care of him."

Francis finally let Matthew go, and cupped his cheek, trying to make him feel at least a little better. "Does he have someone?"

"He has a sister... I think she is at work now."

"Alright. Let's go quickly then."

* * *

They walked next to each other in silence, Kumajirou was in Matthew's arms. Neither of them was saying anything, the bear didn't even complain or ask his owner who he was again. It stayed like this for a while, until the animal suddenly jumped out of Matthew's arms. A strong scent of different kinds of flowers entered the Canadian's nose. He looked to the side, and saw a small shop, with all kinds of beautiful flowers. Above it was a sign, with "Bella's" written on it in huge, colourful letters. This must be the shop where Charlotte worked...

Kumajirou was already gone between the flowers, and Matthew had no other choice than to follow him. Soon enough, they saw the lady standing there, helping a customer. She waved to Matthew when she saw him, before she went back to the other person again.

When the pretty girl was finally done, she turned to the two men with a bright smile. "Bonjour, Mattie!" Then she turned to the other man. "And... Who is this?"

Francis took Charlotte's hand and brought it to his lips, before he winked and told her his name. He stepped closer to the girl, and whispered a few things Matthew couldn't understand, which made her blush. Not even a little bit. It actually made the Canadian feel lonely...so he nudged Francis, reminding him of the reason why they were here again.

"Ah... Yeah. Ma belle, my Mathieu and I came here about a certain...bad...situation."

"Tim. He used drugs."

Charlotte's eyes widened. "Again? I thought he stopped with it..."

Matthew sighed, and stared at his feet. "I-I'm sorry. He got it from some strange guy... But Papa thought that you should take care of him."

Charlotte nodded, and then lied her hand on Matthew's shoulder. "I will. Don't worry, everything will be alright soon. I will make sure that he won't do it again. Okay?"

The Canadian nodded. "But please be careful..."

"Yes, sweetie. I will. Now..." The girl looked back into the shop, and yelled to another girl. "I'm going home now! Something...um... happened, and I need to leave!"

The other girl nodded, before she went back to work.

Before Matthew could say or do anything else, Francis had grabbed his hand, and dragged him out of the shop, Kuma following behind.

* * *

"For the last time, Mathieu. You can't go back."

"But Papa! I'm an adult now, I know how to take care of myself! I can decide it for myself!"

Francis sighed, while he looked out of the window. It was already getting dark outside. The whole time they had been here in Francis' house, they had been arguing. But there was no way that he was going to let Matthew go back to that man. From the moment he had found the little boy on his own in the middle of the city, he had told himself that he would never let his Mathieu go in danger. He had failed once, and certainly wasn't planning to let this happen again.

"Now!?"

The Frenchman looked up when he suddenly heard that demanding voice. "Hm?"

"What are you going to say now...!?"

It was silent for a while, before Francis spread his arms. Matthew let himself fall in the other's embrace, and buried his face in his shoulder. "I just... I just want to become happy with him, Papa."

"Of course, mon cher. I understand. Hey, what do you think about... let's continue this tomorrow, oui? You must be tired..." He pressed a soft kiss on the younger boy's forehead, and gently pushed him away, but Matthew shook his head. "No, Papa... I want to...stay here."

The Canadian curled up on the couch, and lied his head on the other man's lap. The latter let his hand rest on Matthew's hair, and waited until he fell asleep.

...

Not long after, he suddenly got surprised by the sound of his phone ringing. He checked to see if Matthew was awake, and when that wasn't the case, he answered.

"Bonjour?"

"_Hm, it's you. Listen, where's my Mattie?_"

Francis glanced over at the boy, who was stil sleeping peacefully. "Why do you want to know? He was not safe this afternoon with you, cher. I don't want to hurt you, but you have to stay away from him a bit."

"_And who are you to decide that?_" A small crack was audible on the other side, before the other spoke again. "_Listen, you piece of shit. If you ever dare to hurt my Mattie, or even lay as much as a finger on him, I won't hesitate to-_"

"Tim, mon cher..."

"_Don't interrupt me._"

"Please, calm down a bit, oui? Then we can continue to talk."

Suddenly, there was a movement on Francis' lap. Matthew sat up, and rubbed his eyes, still sleepy. "Papa...? Who is that on the phone?"

"It's nothing, Mathieu." The Frenchman smiled gently at him. "Just go back to sleep, okay?"

"_Is that Matthew? MAT!_"

Francis kinda hoped that he hadn't heard anything, but the Canadian's eyes widened. "Tim!" Before the older man could even react, the boy had grabbed the phone, and was now holding it against his ear. "Tim! Finally! How are you? Is everything okay over there?"

"_Yes, I'm fine, Mat. Is everything alright with you? Did he hurt you?_"

Matthew shook his head, even though Tim wouldn't be able to see it. "I'm okay. Pa- Francis didn't hurt me. He would never do that. Though... He said that we...shouldn't see each other anymore."

Before he could add anything else, the phone was taken from his hands. "I'm sorry, Tim, but I think Matthew needs to sleep..."

"_You. Listen. I'm not going to just let this happen. Matthew is an adult, and he can decide what he wants to do. Not you._"

"Tim, cher, I'm just..."

"_I. Don't. Give. A. FUCK about what you think! Matthew is mine! And if you don't agree with it, it's war._"

"But-"

"_It's war._"

Without leaving Francis a chance to respond, the line was broken. The Frenchman stared at Matthew for a moment, the phone still beeping in his hand. Then there was another beep, a loud one this time, telling them that Francis' phone had received a message. He quickly glanced at it.

_12.30, parking lot. If you don't come, I'll find a way._

That one was definitely from Tim...

"Hey, Mathieu," the man said with a gentle smile. "If I promise to let you go to Tim tomorrow, will you go to sleep now?"

The expression of the boy turned into a big grin. "Oh, really, Papa? Merci! Merci beaucoup!" Matthew practically flew into Francis' arms.

"But only if you go to sleep now." The blue-eyed man gently poked Matthew's nose, before giving him a playful slap on his butt.

...

After the boy was gone, there was only one thing left to do... call Arthur and Alfred. He was really going to need someone to cover his back. If his impression of Tim was right, this could get dangerous. Really dangerous.

* * *

It was pitch black between the cars. Tim stood in the middle, waiting for Francis. From his observations, he knew that the man wouldn't straight on attack him. Besides, he still had his four men behind him.

At first he had asked Ludwig to go with him, to which 'The Awesomeness needed to come too!' As soon as Feliciano saw that the Germans were leaving, he wanted to join, and of course, Lovino couldn't leave his little brother unprotected.

Tim lit a cigarette, and stuck it between his teeth, while he kept his hands in the pockets of his coat.

Not too long after, his enemy appeared. Tim stayed in his place, waiting until the man was close enough to talk.

"So, mon cher... What is this all about? I had to leave mon Mathieu alone for this."

Tim clenched the cigarette between his teeth. "As I said before, Matthew is an adult. He can take care of himself. He doesn't need you around him all the time."

"He wants me to."

"Oh?"

"Oui. He was- is in love with me."

Tim spit on the ground. "Oh yeah? Then tell me, _Papa_, why he went back to me. He wouldn't do that if he really loved you. I don't know why he started with you. Maybe he was lonely. And for some reason, he was scared of me."

"Tim, cher... I'm pretty sure you're a nice guy, but..."

Tim laughed. A sarcastic, heartless laugh. "Me? Nice? Laat me niet lachen. I would have sent a bullet between your eyes already if it wasn't for your two little friends over there." He pointed with a jerk of his head towards the roof of a building, and then towards one of the cars behind Francis.

The other man's face dropped. "H-How did you know...?"

"Isn't it obvious? I knew from the moment you entered. But, don't worry. You are not the only one with friends."

There was a loud scream in the background behind Francis.

"You heard it. It's war." Tim closed his fingers firmly around the object in his pocket. Without waiting any longer, he pointed his gun towards Francis' face.

* * *

Matthew opened his eyes, for the hundredth time this night. He just couldn't sleep. The whole time, his thoughts drifted off towards Tim. Would he be okay? Would Matthew be allowed to see him tomorrow?

"Hey, you..." Kumajirou lifted his head, and looked at Matthew with his big, black eyes. "Stop turning so much. I can't sleep."

The Canadian sighed, and brushed his hand through the bear's fur. "I'm sorry, Kuma. I just... I'm worried."

"About what?" The cub stood up from his comfortable spot, and stretched his paws. "Then why don't you go and look for someone who can help you?" he added, without waiting for an answer.

"Hm... I could do that, yes..."

"Let's go."

"Alright." Matthew nodded, and stood up. He took Kumajirou in his arms, and left the room. "Papa?" he called, while he walked around. No answer. Ah, he must still be downstairs...

Without a sound, the boy went down the stairs. "Papa, I can't-"

But there was no Francis.

"Kuma! You go and look for him in the back of the house, I go look in the kitchen!"

Matthew quickly let the polar bear down, and ran to the room. Oh, if something had happened to this man... He wasn't going to forgive the ones who did this!

A quick look in the kitchen told him that the man wasn't here. And when he quickly rushed back, Kumajirou hadn't found him either. There was only one option left... and that was to go outside.

The two quickly ran through the door, not even bothering to lock it – they had other, more important things to worry about at the moment.

Suddenly, Kuma stopped, and sniffed at the ground.

"What is it? Did you find anything?"

Without saying a word, the cub stormed away. Matthew had no other choice than to follow him... even though he quickly lost him in the darkness of the night.

"Kuma! Kumajirou! Wait!" The boy ran after him.. until he reached a corner. Where could he have gone? "Kumaaa!"

"Aiyaa! What are you doing in front of our house-aru?"

Matthew quickly jumped up. But before he could even react at the two men storming out of an awfully familiar house, he suddenly got pulled away. "Be quiet, Mattie," a raspy voice whispered. Then there were Gilbert's strong arms around him for a second, and the next moment he was on the man's back.

Gilbert quickly ducked at a painfully familiar pipe that got swung into his direction. He started to run fast, but it was very obvious that they weren't going to outrun the Russian. The albino lowered Matthew to the ground. "Listen, Mattie. Go away... Leave me here. I will help you escape, you just have to go somewhere. It isn't safe here."

"But Gil! I can't let you-"

_WHACK._

Gilbert only managed to jump away just in time, so he wouldn't get hit by the pipe that was now crashing into the ground. "RUN!"

Seeing that it would be the best if he would just go away, Matthew turned around, and quickly ran away. He had no idea what was going on... but he had to find Francis as fast as possible.

There was the sound of talking on the right... He listened closely, and recognised the two voices. He walked towards the two boys. "Eh, bonjour..."

Feliciano turned around, a wide smile on his face. "Ciao, Matt!" He waved happily, and the man next to him – Alfred, he thought? – was wearing a bright grin on his face.

"Hey, eh, I'm sorry to ask, but what the hell is going on in here? Suddenly there are people fighting, you two are randomly talking in the middle of the night, Francis is gone, Kuma ran off..." He then froze at a loud bang in the distance. "I hear this sound... What is it? Gunshots?"

Feliciano nodded. "Sì.. I think Uncle Tim got angry, and then he asked us to fight. Now actually I was supposed to fight with Alfred over here but he's a nice guy!"

"Wait... What? There's a fight? But... Where is Tim? Is he safe? Is Francis there too? Who are they fighting with?"

Alfred smacked Matthew on his shoulder, in which he supposed a friendly way. "Why don't you take a look for yourself?" He moved the shorter boy, making the latter see a... battlefield. The fight between Gilbert and the Russian had moved to a parking lot, where Ludwig was also fighting with the Russian's Asian friend. Also in the distance, there were four more people, even though it wasn't clearly visible who it were. But wait, was that...?

"Kuma!" Matthew yelled, while he rushed down. He didn't care that he was still in his pyjama's and on his bare feet... He also didn't care that it was not safe. He had to save his friend!

When he reached the place where he had seen Kuma, he had lost him again... Only when he looked around, he realised that he was in the middle of a fight. The Englishman, Arthur, was having a gunfight with Lovino. Even though they were fighting furiously, both of them were too skilled to let themselves get wounded. Meanwhile Matthew just stood there, not knowing what to do.

Until there was a sudden roar from behind one of the vehicles, catching their attention.

"Hey, you with your caterpillar eyebrows..."

It was the voice of Kuma. No mistake about that. The strange thing about it though, was... it got heavier with every word he said, in the end almost just a growl. And then... a big, white head appeared from behind a truck. It was followed by a huge claw, with dark black nails showing.

"Unfortunately for you, Mister Eyebrows... I learned how to master this magic."

Matthew could only watch with his mouth wide open, while his friend – now a full-grown polar bear – came closer, showing his whole big, strong body. Kumajirou stepped closer on his four enourmous paws, until he was right in front of Arthur, shielding both Lovino and Matthew.

"You should have known that I was going to get revenge some day..."

The voice was now a low rumble, vibrating through Matthew's chest. Kuma slowly pushed his front paws off the ground, and lifted his body, so he was standing only on his hind legs, giving his dangerous claws free range. He let out a loud roar, his sharp nails dangerously close to Arthur's head.

"I give you two options. One: You change me back into a human again, and I will let you go. Two: You stay here, and do nothing, and you end up as my dinner. I give you a few seconds, or else I'm assuming that you want option two. Five... Four... Three... Two..."

"Hold on a second. Spells don't work like that, lad. I can only give you one if you come to me later..." Arthur sounded as if he had the situation under control, but Matthew could see that the man was trembling.

Kumajirou growled for a bit, but then he lowered himself again. "This time you will get away. Tomorrow though... I will go to your house, and you change me back. Or else..." He tapped his claws on the asphalt. "And if you don't get out of my sight now... I will make you my dinner. You heard it, LEAVE!"

Arthur quietly walked backwards, and then disappeared.

Kuma turned around, and pressed his wet nose against Matthew's cheek. "Hey. Don't waste time," he rumbled.

The boy looked to his side, where Lovino stood, with a pale face. He ran a hand through the soft fur on Kuma's neck, while he tried to smile gently – he was still in a bit of a shock from all that had happened. "Lovino... Why don't you go and help Gilbert and Ludwig eh? I'm going to look for Francis and Tim. Okay?"

Lovino quietly nodded, and left. Now there was only one thing left to do... They had to rush. There was no time to lose! Matthew put his foot on his polar bear's shoulder, and pulled himself up. "Let's go!" he shouted, and the animal stormed off. The human just clung to the white fur, careful not to fall. Which was probably not going to happen, since Kuma wasn't the smallest bear around...

Not too long after, they reached two men. They were standing in front of each other. Matthew immediately recognised them as the two he cared the most about.

It was silent, very silent... Francis was unarmed, his eyes filled with both rage and fear as he looked at Tim, who was... pointing a gun towards him.

Matthew couldn't think anymore. His body acted on his own, as he slid off the bear, and ran towards Francis. Tim wasn't in any danger now, it was Francis he had to protect...

He jumped in front of the older man, shielding him with his body. At least... he didn't hope Tim would just hurt him like this...

There was a sudden change in Tim's expression. Did he seem confident at first, sure that he was going to win... Right now his expression dropped. Matthew couldn't read this anymore. What was he thinking? And more importantly, what was he going to do next...?

There was one whispered word. "_Vaarwel._" Bang! A heartbeat. Riiiiiiip. Silence.


	9. Chapter 9

_***pant...pant...* Finally, guys... This is the last chapter. I love this story so much... I'm so in love with this story. It was my first story on here, and I'm glad that you guys liked it so much! Just one more thing, I will make another small story with NedCan..oneshots, I think. This story is continued in that story, but there's no plot... just fluff and the occasional smut. In case I miss writing NedCan too much~ **_

**Alright guys, text that is written **_like this _**means that it's spoken in Dutch~ And also... well, yeah, when Tim's family speaks it's also in Dutch. But I guess – hope – you understand that~**

* * *

**Je buien maken vlekken,**  
_- Your tempers are making stains _  
**op een hagelwit humeur**  
_- On a hailwhite mood_  
**Ik heb m'n handen op je heupen,**  
_- I've got my hands on your hips_  
**Maar m'n hoofd is bij de deur.**  
_- But my head is at the door_  
**Ze zeggen dat het went,**  
_- They say you get used to it_  
**Ik heb het geprobeerd.**  
_- I've tried_  
**Maar hoe ik het ook wend of keer, **  
_- But how I twist and turn it_  
**Mijn huis beschermt niet meer.**  
_- My house doesn't protect any longer_

**Het regent harder dan ik hebben kan,**  
_- It's raining harder than I can take_  
**Harder dan ik drinken kan.**  
_- Harder than I can drink_  
**Het regent harder dan de grond aankan,**  
_- It's raining harder than the ground can take_  
**Harder dan ik hebben kan.**  
_- Harder than I can take_

**Je buien zijn de wolken,**  
_- Your tempers are the clouds _  
**Aan een hemelsblauw humeur.**  
_- On a heavenlyblue mood_  
**Ik heb m'n handen op je heupen,**  
_- I've got my hands on your hips_  
**Maar m'n hoofd is bij de deur.**  
_- But my head is at the door_  
**Je ogen blijven grijs,**  
_- Your eyes remain grey_  
**Ontkennen elke kleur.**  
_- Denying every colour_  
**Het is alsof hier niemand woont**  
_- It's like as if no one lives here_  
**alsof er niets gebeurt.**  
_- As if nothing happens_

**Het regent harder dan ik hebben kan,**  
_- It's raining harder than I can take_  
**Harder dan ik drinken kan.**  
_- Harder than I can drink_  
**Het regent harder dan de grond aankan,**  
_- It's raining harder than the ground can take_  
**Harder dan ik hebben kan**.  
_- Harder than I can take_

_ watch?v=1Wa9GLu3JOY_

_-Harder dan ik hebben kan, by Bløf-_

* * *

Tim clenched his teeth, as he looked straight into Matthew's widened eyes. The gun fell from his hand, and hit the floor with a clicking sound. He stumbled a bit, and then fell to his knees. The pain in his side was almost unbearable. His vision was starting to become blurry, but he still managed to reach out a gloved hand, which was covered in blood.. He could faintly see how Matthew took his hand, before everything disappeared. Only black remained.

* * *

...

* * *

~15 years ago~

* * *

"Mommy! Daddy!"

A little boy with short, blond hair looked up at the sudden sound of a voice. He adjusted his brown hat, and stood up. "_Lot! You stay here, I will go!_" he told a little girl next to him.

"_Okay Timmie_~" the girl hummed.

The boy stood up, and disappeared into the crowd. He was only six years old, but the other person sounded as if he really needed help...

There it was again. A little, hopeless voice. "Mommy! Daddy!"

Tim narrowed his eyes. There was a little boy, running around between the people, more often than not bumping into them. Tears were streaming down his cheeks.

Tim looked around him. No one seemed to be looking for the boy. But he also couldn't leave the little kid alone! He waited for a bit, and then walked towards him.

The little boy gasped, and looked up, letting out a soft squeak.

Tim cleared his throat before he started to speak. "Um... Hallo, ik ben-" He stopped when he realised that this was France they were in, and that the other probably wouldn't understand him. This was a problem... "You...help?" he tried. He didn't know a lot about speaking English...

But the younger boy nodded. Tim took his hand, and pulled him to the side of the path. "Me, Tim!" he said, while he pointed to his chest with his thumb.

"I am Matthew," the boy whispered quietly. "I lost my parents..."

"Parents...?" What did that mean again..? Ah! Ouders! "You lost mama en papa! Toch?"

"Pa...pa?" The little kid wrapped his small arms around Tim's waist, making him freeze and step back a bit. He wasn't used to hugs, only from his two siblings. And one of them was currently gone with his mother to a far place he and his sister were forbidden to know about...

He didn't make a move to hug the boy back, but instead gently patted his head.

"I'm scared..."

"No. No scared," Tim growled softly. "I help you."

Matthew nodded, and wiped his tears from his eyes. "You are nice, Tim. I like you."

"I like you also," the little Dutch kid mumbled. That caused a wide smile to appear on Matthew's face. "Yay!"

"Um... yay," Tim said, a bit less enthusiast, but still happy.

"Tim?"

Matthew took his new friend's hand. "Let's go do something together!"

The older boy nodded. "Ja. Let's do something. What want you?"

"Let's look around until we find my parents! I heard they have lots of things on the market!"

"Mh..."

Hand in hand, the two walked away. It was really busy, but they managed to stay together and not get lost.

Suddenly Matthew jumped up. "Look! Animals!" He quickly ran off and disappeared.

"Wacht!" Tim shouted, before he ran after him. He pushed a gate open, and entered some sort of small field.

Then there was a harsh push on his shoulder, and he fell down on his butt. He quickly looked around him. What was that!?

_Nyeeeeh._

Tim stood up, and turned around, only to look straight at a little lamb's face. He growled softly at the animal. "_Hrr.. I will get you..._"

"Tiiiiim!"

The sudden voice made the boy look to his right. There was Matthew, with a little bunny on his lap. Tim walked towards him, and sat down next to him.

"You want to pet too?"

With a wide grin, the youngest boy picked the bunny up, and let him down again on the other's lap. Tim froze a bit, but then he gently started to pet the little animal. "Soft..." he mumbled.

"Yes!" Matthew took Tim's hand, and leaned against his shoulder. They were sitting in a peaceful silence for a while, Tim just petting the bunny with his free hand.

"Did you know, in French they call me Mathieu!" the shorter one said after a while.

"Oh..? Oh..." Tim sighed a bit. "In...Netherlands, they say...Matthijs, I think..."

"Matthijs? I like that! You can call me that!"

"Mhm."

It was silent again, and neither of them seemed to mind it.

"Uhm, where lives your home?" the Dutch boy asked after a few moments.

"Far away. In... Kanata!"

"Kanata? Oh..." He had never heard of such a place... "I am out a far place too."

"Where?"

Tim was silent for a while. "Nu-nu-Nederland!" he stuttered.

Matthew just smiled. "I like you, Tim."

"I like you also."

It didn't matter that they had said the exact same words before. Tim didn't mind it if he had to say it very often. He liked it when he felt loved. Even though his sister tried to show him her love often... it was very different – and maybe a bit nicer – if it was someone else, someone he barely knew, to tell him that they liked him.

"Bonjour, mes petits," a sudden voice said, interrupting their silence.

The bunny jumped away from Tim's lap.

Another boy appeared, a bit older than the two of them. He had blond hair, just like Matthew, which was tied in a ponytail.

Tim didn't know what to say. He only understood simple English, let alone French!

But the boy in front of them knelt down, and smiled. "Où sont tes parents?"

Matthew slowly shook his head, his eyes a bit wide. "I don't understand..." he muttered.

"Ah! You two speak English?" Another gentle smile. It was only now that Tim noticed that the boy's clothes were torn at several parts, and dirty. Didn't he have money for new ones?

Matthew just opened his mouth to say something back, when a loud voice suddenly echoed through the air. "_Tim! Where the fuck are you!?_"

The little boy quickly stood up, panic clearly visible in his eyes. Oh shit...

"_There!_" That was the voice of his sister.

"I... must go..." Tim mumbled.

"Bye Tim! Until next time!"

At that moment, a tall man entered the field. "_Tim! Come the fuck here!_"

The little boy walked towards the man, his head low. He looked exactly like him, only an older version...

The man grabbed his shoulder harshly. "_What have you been doing? You left your sister all alone! I thought you were a little responsible!_"

"_I'm sorry...father..._"

"_You better be. Now leave this boy and his brother alone, we're going home._"

Tim nodded, afraid to say anything else. He looked over his shoulder, having one last look of his new friend, before he shook his head, and walked away.

* * *

~9 years later~

* * *

Tim closed his eyes as he exhaled, making a big cloud of smoke appear from his lips. He didn't even want to think about what had happened. About why he had a bruise on his cheek, another one on his shoulder, and another one on his back... He hated that man. There was no person he hated more than that man. And that said a lot, seeing as how he disliked about everyone. The only ones he kinda liked were his sister Charlotte, and his cousin Ludwig.

Speaking of the latter... He used to speak him (and his annoying brother) often when they were younger, due to them living only about half an hour away from each other, despite living in other countries. But recently, Ludwig had moved to America, with his father and brother...

Tim already had the plan to escape. He was going to go after them. That was the first thing he was going to do, as soon as he had enough money...

There was a sudden knock on the door, interrupting him from his thoughts. Charlotte entered the room. "Hey, Timmie..." She started nice, but sighed when she saw the pipe in Tim's mouth. "No... Don't tell me you are doing it again..." She walked over to her brother, and took the pipe from his mouth. "Listen, Tim... I'm not going to start again... Isn't it better to just talk to someone instead of ruining yourself like that?"

The boy rolled his eyes. "I already told you many times. I don't have someone. I'm not going to bother you with this, and other than that I don't have anyone."

"Hm..." Charlotte sat down on Tim's bed, hugging one of her legs. "What about a pet? Pets are good listeners."

Tim growled softly. "I'm not going to waste my time talking to an animal."

"Better than wasting your time on drugs. That isn't going to get you anywhere."

This made Tim quiet. How much he hated to admit it... She was right. He sighed, before he looked at Charlotte. "Fine."

* * *

~6 years later~

* * *

"Hey Tim!" Gilbert said, or rather yelled, as he entered the room.

Tim, who was sitting on the couch, holding his bunny, looked up. "What do you want?"

"Hm, Toni and I are going to Francis."

"Again? You always go to that guy."

"But I don't think you have met him before... You should come with me! It's fun!"

Tim sighed. "And what am I supposed to do there?"

"I don't know. Make new friends or something. You're always here, on your own..."

"I don't mind that."

"I know. But you should at least try. You can always go home if you don't like it."

Tim sighed as he stood up. He had nothing else to do in this house, so he might as well search for some distraction...

"Hm, I have to pick Toni up. We're going to sleep there, and I don't think he's going to mind if you stay there too. So... you can get your stuff, while I get Antonio."

Without saying another word, Tim walked upstairs.

* * *

With a sigh, he dropped his bag into the hallway. His bunny was struggling in his arms, so he guessed that she wanted some freedom. He walked outside, around the house, and entered a little field. He put Nijntje down, and watched as she hopped around and started to nibble on the grass.

Tim put his hands in his pockets and leaned against a wall, his eyes closed. He and Nijntje knew each other already long enough for him to know that she wouldn't just walk away.

He waited for a little while, until he found that it had been long enough, and he opened his eyes. Nijntje wasn't anywhere near him though...

In a fast pace, the Dutch man walked around the house. Soon enough he saw what was happening... A little bear was running towards his bunny. Now was it a surprise that there was an actual bear in this area, but that wasn't important now. Tim didn't waste any time, and right as the bear was about to get close to his Nijntje, he put his leg between them. "Nobody touches my Nijntje," he growled.

He looked up, and saw... a boy. He could swear that his heart stopped beating for a second, when he looked into those big, innocent eyes. It wasn't the first time that he had seen those eyes... He was sure of it. Because he had never forgotten his encounter with this boy. The one who was the first one to make him feel loved.

Tim coughed quickly, to prevent getting lost in his thoughts. "Hallo. Is this your bear?"

It would be the best to just act like he knew nothing of the boy.

He saw how the younger man nodded, and took the bear in his arms. "I-I'm sorry..."

"It's the bear's fault."

Right now Tim didn't know what to say anymore... It was too hard to control the beating in his chest. So he quickly picked Nijntje up, let her go on his shoulder, and walked away.

…

Only after a short walk around the house, he thought that it was time to go inside. He followed the directions this Francis had given him, and went towards the room he was supposed to stay in for the night.

But when he opened the door... someone was already there. His face was red, his eyes swollen.

"You're crying," Tim stated. "What is your name?"

_I am Matthew. I lost my parents..._

_Did you know, in French they call me Mathieu!_

_Matthijs? I like that! You can call me that! _

"Ehm... I... My... I am... Matthew..."

Tim really didn't like the look on the boy's face. He lied his hand on top of Matthew's head. "Call me when you feel sad. …Matthijs."

Tim ruffled the boy's hair. He leaned down, and wanted to press a kiss on his lips...

He couldn't reach him. No matter how hard he tried. The distance between him and Matthew became bigger and bigger.

"Nee! Matthijs!"

The Canadian stood up, and reached his arm out. "Tim! Tim!"

* * *

…

* * *

"TIM!"

The man slowly opened his eyes. A familiar face was hovering above him. "You're awake! Finally!"

There were sudden arms around his neck. Tim groaned softly. "Ugh..." His side was hurting... "Where are we, Matt?"

Matthew kissed Tim's cheek softly. "We're in your country, Tim. In a hospital."

The Dutchman sat up, groaning and using Matthew as support. Right at that moment, he remembered what had happened. He could clearly see everything; from the way Francis looked at him to how Matthew protected the other man... How he had acted on an impulse, and put the gun against his side...

He had been stupid. Very stupid. He knew that... But there was nothing he could change about it anymore. So he leaned into Matthew's touch.

"In my country, huh..."

"Yes. Charlotte was here too, just a few hours ago. But she had to go home, there was something with her shop..."

"Hm." Tim moved his hand down, to take Matthew's in his own, and he intertwined their fingers.

"But don't worry," his boyfriend continued. "I'll stay here, with you." He kissed Tim's forehead. "Kuma is at your father's house. Charlotte said that we can stay there."

"And Nijntje?"

"Your bunny? Don't worry, Kuma is taking care of her."

"They became friends, right?"

"Yes~ They are so cute together~"

"Hm..."

Tim pressed a soft kiss on his boyfriend's lips. Matthew leaned in, but before the kiss could deepen, the older of the two pulled the other into the bed. Matthew looked shocked for a while, not really expecting this, but then he grinned, and lied his head on Tim's chest.

"I can't wait until you get home, you know..." he mumbled, while pressing several soft kisses on his love's skin.

"Hmm... Neither," the Dutchman mumbled.

* * *

Tim entered through the painfully familiar door. He swallowed a moment, but then he felt Matthew's hand in his own again. He squeezed it softly. Everything was okay now. That man wasn't here, after all. Instead, it was his Mattie at his side.

"Hey, you assholes! Took you long enough..."

Tim sighed when he heard that voice. He expected the bear to come just around the corner... but in front of him stood a little teenage boy. He had short, black hair, and dark eyes. His hands were in his sides, as he glared up at Tim.

"You look...different," the man dryly stated.

"And what if I do? It's not as if you are the best looking person in the world!"

Matthew let out a little laugh, as he shoved the boy away.

"This is Kuma," he said softly.

"I... heard that..."

The boy stuck his tongue out, and escaped to his room.

Matthew wrapped his arms around Tim. "I'm sorry for that... He turned human, as you can see." The young man purred softly, and placed little kisses on the taller man's neck. "You are the best looking person for me, if you wanted to know..."

Tim raised a brow, a little smirk appearing on his face as he wrapped his arms around his boyfriend's waist and placed his hands on his butt. "Are you trying to seduce me now?"

"Maybe..."

Tim froze a bit when he suddenly felt Matthew's tongue over his skin. He chuckled, and lifted Matthew up, so the boy could wrap his legs around his waist. He pulled his lover into a kiss, while walking up the stairs. The kiss became more passionate, and when the two finally reached the bed, they had both lost their shirts already.

Soon after, their pants also ended up on the floor. The kiss continued, as they grinded their hips against each other. Tim waisted no time, eager as he was, and entered his finger to prepare his lover. When his next fingers followed, Matthew was already moaning and squirming under him.

The Dutchman removed his fingers, and pressed a few gentle kisses on his boyfriend's lips. "Are you ready?"

The Canadian looked up at him, with red cheeks. "For you always."

Tim took Matthew's hips firmly in his hands, and pushed inside. Matthew yelped a little bit, so he placed more soft, sweet kisses on his face. As soon as the other calmed down, the tall man started to move. After a few thrusts he got rewarded already with a few soft moans. But that was not enough, he wanted to hear more of those sounds...

It didn't take long before he heard more of these delicious moans, louder this time, making him speed up his thrusts. Matthew released soon, Tim following not too long after. He collapsed next to Matthew, and pulled the younger boy in his arms.

"I love you, ik hou van je, ik heb je lief," he mumbled, his lips searching the familiar skin of his lover's face again.

"I love you too. Je t'aime, Tim. ...Timmie~"

A snort was the answer. "Whatever you want...Matthijs. Mijn konijntje."

The two curled closer to each other, sharing sweet kisses while cuddling. After a long while of peaceful silence, Matthew opened his mouth again.

"Hey, Tim..."

"Hm?"

"We will stay together, right?"

"Definitely."

The two finally fell asleep, arms around each other, dreaming of the things they had experienced, and the beautiful things they were still going to experience. It really was like a dream that came true. For the both of them. And as long as they kept holding on to their dreams, everything was alright. Just like it was supposed to be.

* * *

**So, that was Harder Dan Ik Hebben Kan... Thanks for sticking around guys, take it easy~ And keep watching for the next story!**


End file.
